Live in Color

nineteen - emerald

The first thing that escapes Arsenio's mouth is, "Don't tell Jericho." I just stare at Arsenio for a couple of seconds, completely in shock, trying to put the puzzle pieces together in my mind. After not hearing a reply, Arsenio gets up from his seat, striding over to me and heatedly whispering, "Do not tell Jericho."

"He doesn't know?" is the first thing I manage.

Arsenio shakes his head, "No, and you can't tell him. If he has to find out, I have to tell him. But he doesn't have to know, okay? He doesn't."

Arsenio is panicking. His breaths are laboured and he's clutching his fingers to the point that I know he's feeling pain. I hate the guy, I really do, but this new found information makes me soften up just a bit. "Hey, it's okay, I'm not going to tell. It's not really my business."

"It sure as hell isn't," he agrees. Arsenio seems to relax, the tension in his shoulders that had come so abruptly. He turns his head back to see Jericho still passed out on the bed, making him sigh and run a hand down his face in stress.

I bite down on my lip, "Can I ask though...?" When he doesn't stop me, I continue, "How do you know the names? Jericho said he couldn't learn them because color books are forbidden."

Arsenio sighs, his voice holding a softness I had never heard before when he suggests, "Let's sit on the balcony."

We end up doing just that, our legs dangling over the edges, my forehead leaning against the railings while Arsenio's is looking down, his hands fidgeting in his lap. He sighs, looking up and meeting my eyes. Just like last time, I'm not able to see any emotion in his eyes, but the look of distress is evident on his face.

"A couple of months before Jericho bumped into you, I bumped into my soulmate in a grocery store. She was... is..." he closes his eyes, resting his forehead against the railing. "Beautiful. Everything about her glowed. She had these gorgeous blue eyes with like a mixture of green. It was like they were swirling together. They were so, so mesmerizing, you could just get lost in them." I don't think if Arsenio wasn't feeling as vulnerable as he probably is right now, he'd be telling me this. In fact, I think his mind is even registering exactly who he's talking to right now. All he cares about is the fact that finally, he has the chance to talk about something that he's been holding in for far too long.

"And her hair... it was short and curled, but really lightly curled. Her hair was brown but got lighter at the bottom, like an ombre effect. But it was really subtle and gentle, just like her personality. I mean, I didn't really get to talk to her much but... I could just tell. She, um, well after we bumped into each other- it was kind of obvious, you know? And I just remember she opened her mouth to say something, but I cut her over and told her that I wasn't going to be with her. Then I walked away." Arsenio puts his head in his hands. "I felt sick afterwards. It felt so wrong to leave her. My friends and mom told me that she's just going to hurt me in the end. So I, I tried. First, I tried to live without her, but it just hurt too much. So then I tried to get her back. But when I found her again- I asked a friend who knew her for her address- she was so different. Her hair was long- extensions, I suppose- she wore so much dark makeup that just didn't go with her kind looks, and she was no longer gentle. The minute she saw me she told me to go to hell. I tried everything, I apologized over and over again and told her I made a mistake but she just told me she'd never date a rebel." Arsenio scoffs and softly says, "She said the word like it was poison.

"After that, she moved houses and I haven't seen her since." Arsenio looks up at me with haunted eyes, the first emotion I've ever seen in those orbs, "See, Natalie? They all just leave in the end. I tried to make things right but she wouldn't listen. I get that she was upset but... it wasn't true love, not if she wouldn't listen to me, right?" He sounds desperate. "Soulmates are supposed to have true love."