Not So Yours

Chapter Seven

Andy was sitting on the floor of the shower while I was standing above him. I was standing in the stream of water so his hair wasn't getting anymore wet than it needed to be. I absolutely covered it in conditioner. I used about half of the full bottle that I had going into this. I tried running my fingers through it and it worked until a certain point. I groaned in frustration and started practically yanking his hair out.

"I need a hair cut don't I?" He asked laughing slightly at my frustration. 

"Yes Andy you need a f-cking hair cut. First wash the stupid conditioner out of your hair. This S-it usually works wonders." I said angrily washing my hands off in the water. 

"It's not your fault that I let my hair go to S-it." He said from behind me. He was standing up now and waiting for me to get out of the way so he would wash the conditioner out of his hair. 

"It just makes me pissed that I couldn't fix it. I usually do well with things like this." I said still angry. I turned around to face him and bit my lip seeing him shirtless. I wasn't able to clearly check him out in the pool yesterday. He looked extremely hot. 

"Stop staring at my hot bod and get out of the way. Like you said I need to get the stupid conditioner out of my hair." He said smirking at me.

He placed his hands on my shoulders and moved us so he was now standing in my place. I blushed a deep red and he laughed at me. I started getting out of the shower but was stopped when Andy spun me around again and looked at my hip. He ran his thumb over my scars and looked sadly at them for a few minutes. I just kind of stood there ridged. No guy has really done something like that before. 

"Will they ever go away?" He asked softly. I lifted my eyes and his immediately bore into mine. I pursed my lips together a shook my head. 

"I just have to live with them. They're just a reminder of how weak and hopeless I was back then." I said laughing sadly. 

He wrapped both of his arms around my waist and pulled me into a hug. I slowly wrapped my arms around his neck. My face was buried in his neck as he lifted me off of the shower floor. He put me down after about a minute but still didn't let me go.

"Please promise to never do that again." He whispered almost pleading into my ear. 

"I'm not that same person anymore Andy. I haven't thought about it for years." I said laughing sadly again. 

"Just please promise me that you'll never do it again OK?" He said now holding me at arms length. His arms were much longer than mine so my hands rested on his forearms. 

"I can't do that Andy. I don't know if I'm going to hit rock bottom again or not." I said seriously looking him straight in the eye. I was being completely serious to. I didn't know what was going to happen in the future. But I did know that if I did get low again I probably wouldn't be able to stop myself no matter how hard I tried. 

"G-D D-MN JUST PROMISE ME THAT YOU'LL NEVER HURT YOURSELF AGAIN!!" He yelled practically begging me. I don't know what possessed him to be this way right now. He's never cut himself, I know he hears from his fans all the time about how their music helped them through everything. 

"That's just the thing Andy I can't do that. I don't want to let you down in case I ever do self harm again. I do know that right now I wouldn't dream of it. My life is to good to be anything except for happy." I said now genuinely smiling. He just sighed and pulled me into another hug. His arms were wrapped securely around my shoulders while mine were wrapped around his waist. We kind of just stayed in that position for who knows how long. 

"Andy are you still in the shower man?" Ashley asked coming into the bathroom. I froze and looked up at Andy with wide eyes. Who knows what people would think if they saw us in a shower together, in swim suits or not it's suggestive.