She's Gone (sequel to she's yours)

Chapter 11

I feverishly threw clothes that I assumed were mine into my suitcase. I can't believe my son is sick. I know he's strong and he's going to make it through this. He has to, he's my only son. 

"Ashton what's wrong?" Luke asked, watching me panic. 

"Owen is sick, I'm going home!"

"Well I know he's sick. Why do you have to go. Isn't it just the flu?" Luke tilted his head and crossed his arms.

"Last time I checked, acute myeloid leukemia isn't the flu Luke! I'm. Going. Home." I snapped at him. 

"Shit Ash are you kidding? Well I'm not staying here if Owen is sick. I'm basically the kids uncle. Let's pack." Luke started packing up his clothes as well. 

"Where do you think you boys are going?" Our crew manager asked us in an annoyed tone.

"Home." We both said.

"No you're not. I don't know who you think you are, but you can't just leave." He crossed his arms at us.

"Okay, well you let me know when your son has cancer and you're on tour. All I want to do is hold him while he goes through whatever treatment he has to do." My manager just uncrossed his arms and gave me the notion to continue, so I did.

Luke and I finished packing and the bus was going to stop at the next airport. Michael and Cal decided to come with us, because we cancelled the rest of the tour. I'm never again in my life leaving my family. I think 5 seconds of summer is officially over.

The next airport was literally like 3 hours away from where we were right now. I can't believe my son is sick. He has been living with this disease for 2 months and I've been touring. I never wanted to leave my family this is the worst possible outcome. Owen still hates me. I've been gone for 10 months and he hates me. I missed his 8th birthday, I missed all his soccer games, all of his school activities. He doesn't understand that I have to be where I am. He barely talks to me anymore and I hate it. Now he's sick and I feel like a terrible father. I've done nothing but let him down in this last year. Owen says that I ruined life and he wishes I got hit by the car and not Bryar. Trust me, so do I.

We finally arrived to the airport and we boarded the next plane to Australia. I'm coming home Owen, I'm coming home.

***

I ran inside the house and found Owen, Bella and my mom watching T.V.

"Daddy?!" Bella ran to me. I picked her up, spun her around a few times and just held my daughter.

"I thought you still had to tour in America?" She questioned.

"We cancelled the tour, I needed to come home. The band is over baby, I'll be home all the time now. You don't have to worry about me leaving ever again I promise." I kissed her cheek. 

"Owen!" I went to go give him a hug but he ignored it. "Buddy, please. I came home for you." I begged.

"Well I wish you hadn't. I don't need you anymore Ashton." He said harshly.

"I am your dad, you don't call me by my first name." I said back. I hate to be acting like this, but I still have dad responsibilities. 

"Are you my dad? Because lately you aren't a very good one. You leave me and I get cancer and I'm going to die now." 

"No you aren't. There are so many treatments you can get. You'll be alright." I smiled and leaned closer to him, but he inched away.

"The only way treatment can help is if I actually get it. I'm not doing that. I'm gonna see mom again. She's a better parent then you will ever be, Ashton." He spat in my face and stomped out of the room.

I don't know what to do at this point, honestly. Owen is sick but he doesn't want help. He want's this disease to kill him so he can be with Bryar. Is being with me that bad? I try so hard to be with him at all costs, and I just can't. I can't be 2 people at once. I know I can force Owen to go through treatment, but do I actually want to risk him hating me forever for it. Plus, I know he could be depressed or something on top of all of this. I know Bryar and I both have a history with it, and I wouldn't be surprised if him, or Bella suffer with it in their lives. Why did Bryar and I have kids? We are both sincerely fucked up people that needed help ourselves. How did we think we'd help our children?

My mom went back home for the next few days, to give Owen, Bella and I some space. Owen stays in his room and won't go to school . Bella, who is 10 now, is in year 4 and she excels in her classes. Bella doesn't hate me nearly as much as Owen does and I'm so glad for that. I couldn't live with myself if I've messed up so badly that both of my children hate me. I always thought of myself as a good dad, and I guess I'm a shit one. 

I sat on my bed and just thought about everything going on in m life lately and it sucks. I felt tears starting to form in my eyes and I couldn't stop it anymore. 

"Dad?" Bella peeked her head into the room.

"Come in sweetie!" I greeted her.

"I wanna sleep in your bed tonight. I missed you. Am I too big for this?" She asked, holding a stuffed animal wearing her old Christmas pajamas that I had bought her. 

"You will never be too old I promise. Come on." I patted the empty space where Bryar used to sleep.

"Daddy, you're crying. Owen's gonna die isn't he. Am I gonna lose another person in my life? I can't handle that." She started crying to.

"I will do anything in my power to make sure Owen stays here, I promise you that Bella. We just have to convince him to do his treatments and he'll be okay. I'm gonna need your help though. Can you do that for me Belly Belle?" I curled up and cuddled with Bella. 

"I promise daddy. " She kissed my cheek. "But you have to shave your beard first. You look 30."

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I'm slaying these updates lately! wow look at me! I'm still thinking about ideas for a new ash fanfic so if you guys think of anything let me know. I'm open to anything. 

-Becca <3