dreams (river phoenix)

chapter 9

2 weeks after the club
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(Rivers pov)

I broke up with sam the night I took Hanna to the viper room. She was totally drunk but I still needed to get it out of my system and just do it and maybe in that moment she'd hurt less than if she was in her right mind. But that is the exact opposite of what happened, when Hanna was meeting flea I took sam out the stage doors into the back ally to tell her I was breaking up with her. She thought we were going to hookup back there. She came all up on me and started to kiss me aggresively. I tried to push her off when out of the corner of my eye I saw Hanna standing by the door with a tear welling up in her eye and I swear I heard her heart shatter. She knew I was still with sam, but she also knew I had feeling for her because I can't hide anything and shes not stupid. I pushed Sam off my and tried to run after her but she got in a cab and drove off with my house keys AND car keys.

Hanna has been ignoring me since then. Now she barley even looks at me and whenever I try to talk to her she turns around and walks away or stares at me blankly indicating she wants no part with me. When I got home last night from a party which I was supposed to take her to but she wouldn't come, I heard loud sobs coming from her room. I had a feeling it was because of me, but she seemed really sensitive. Too sensitive with that so maybe it was something else, I hope its me because U didnt want anything bad happening to her or what was left of her little broken family. Maybe she's leaving and going back home? Maybe something happened with her mom? who knows, but I'm determined to find out one way or another.

(Hanna's pov)
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As far as I know River had no idea that I saw him kissing sam. He probably just thinks i'm on my period or something, Basic fuckboy though am I right ladies? Who am I even talking to, I'm loosing my mind. Last night I called my house to see how everything was going because I hadn't heard from them in a couple of days maybe even a week. A stranger answered the phone, specifically a man.

"Hello?" he asked

"Uhm hi, is Julie king avalible.?" I was getting a little nervous...

"Is this Hanna?"

"Yes it is, now may I speak to my mom." I said in a harsh and demanding tone.

The man let out a sad sigh "Honey, this is Scott, a friend of your dads, Your mom you see, she has uhm, been in an accident and is on life support. Doctors are doing everything they can and she is in surgery right now. I am taking care of your brother untill further notice but if she doesn't make it only you can have custody of him or he will be put in a friendly home which is a foster home." My stomach dropped into my feet. I just dropped the phone and grabbed a bag. I started just throwing the random clothes into my suitcase leaving more than half of my things in rivers house. This all became too overwhelming for me, I couldn't do anything but drop to my knees and let out loud sobs, I couldn't deal with losing my mom AND my dad, or knowing my brother could be put in a home, or I, ME would have to take him in. I don't have enough money for myself so how on Earth could I take care if him? I don't have a house or a job that pays enough for two people. This was going to be living hell, but I would have to convince River to let Kevin live with us if my mom doesn't make it but god please let her live.

I heard the front door click shut indicating River was home. Wow, home, I just called this home even though i'd only been here for a couple of weeks. My heart was meant to be here, with River. Even though he thinks I hate him right now he knows I care about him. I slowly get up becuase I here him coming up the stairs. I open my bedroom door revealing him, I couldn't help myself I run up and give him the buggest hug i've ever given anyone. He doesn't do anything but hug me back and we just stand there for what seemed like an eternity embracing each other, making up for all the time we'ed spent being mad at each other. I continued to sob into his chest as he rubbed my back and whispered "Everything will be okay." even though he didn't know that for the most part it wouldn't be okay. That he is going to die in a month, that i'm losing my mother, that we might have to take care of my brother which will be hell on earth, but I would still love to have him here with me.

"River." I choked out. "What love?" he asked and it tore me, "My m- mom is on life support, she was in an accident. She's uhm not supposed t-to make it." I barley spat out. All he did was stare at me with deep sorrow in his eyes. He knew how much this would crush me. "Hanna, i'm so so so sorry. You don't deserve this. But whats going to happen with your brother? He just turned 13 and he will be an orphan..?" I felt so desperate asking him for Kevin to live with us, but what am I supposed to do? Let him live with a stranger who our family barley knew? "I feel SO selfish asking this but i'm desperate for help, I have the option of letting Kevin live with me or he will be put into a friendly home." I feel so defeated in life. I'm 20 years old and I've lost both my parents, i'm loving with an almost dead movie star, and my baby brother is about to move in with me. "Hanna of course he could live with us, I mean its not that bad he needs a guy in his life anyways since your dad passed. Look at this as an oppourtunity, look at everything life gives you as an oppourtunity good or bad. Everything happens for a reason." I let go of him and stared into his beautiful blue eyes. I couldn't help myself, I kissed him gently and passionatly. He seemed shocked but he kissed back. I loved him. River and I have only been friends for a month or two and he's already done more for than anyone.