emotions (phan)

nineteen

"Dan?"

My eyes watered. "Hey, little sis."

She dropped her stuff, rushing over and, her being shorter than me, jumped into my arms. I held her tightly, nudging my head into her shoulder. "What are you doing here?" She cried, her voice slightly muffled from her face being pressed against my shirt. I set her down.

"My emotions are back, Audrey," I spoke. She grinned widely, but that faded once she punched me in the arm. "Ow! What was that for?"

"That was for leaving us!" She stomped her foot, but then threw her arms around me. I hugged her back. "I forgive you though. Just promise you won't do it again?"

Then she raised her pinky out and I smiled, flashbacks appearing in my mind of us in our younger years, using our pinkys to promise anything and everything. I intertwined my finger with hers.

"Promise."

We pulled away and she looked at Phil, raising an eyebrow. "Hello there," Audrey flirted. Phil's eyes widened and I laughed, setting a hand on her shoulder.

"He's gay."

Her eyes widened and within seconds her face was redder than a tomato, her body stiff and lips parted slightly in embarrassment. "O-Oh."

Then I wondered over behind Phil, pecking his cheek after placing my hands on his shoulders. "He's also my boyfriend."

"Oh. Oh my god, oh my god- I'm so sorry! I didn't know! You just- you looked young- I. . . you. . . can we just pretend this never happened? Please? I'm still so sorry-"

"It's fine, really. I'm flattered if I'm being honest," Phil chuckled. I rolled my eyes.

"Well, who's hungry for some dinner? Should I order some pizza?" Mum offered.

"Yes!" Audrey, Phil and I yelled.

My dad chuckled and left to call the pizza place while Phil and I went upstairs to my old room. Everything was the way I left it, videos games all over my TV and movie posters strewn across my walls. I had my sonic bedsheets still there which made Phil giggle, and my old DS sitting on my nightstand.

"Nice room," Phil teased, sitting down on my bed and looking around. "Very. . . cozy."

I flipped him off. "Oh, shut up. I was a teenager. I bet your old room isn't any better," I told him. He shrugged.

I flopped down next to him, staring at the ceiling, his hand on top of mine.

"Phil," I murmured.

"Hm?"

"I love you."

He smiled at me, rolling over to straddle me. He leaned down a pressed a firm kiss to my lips, his hands tangled in my hair while mine held his waist. He pulled away, pecking my nose one last time before looking at me. "I love you too."

"None of this would've happened without you. Because of you I have my family back. I have my feelings back."

"Guys! Pizza's here!" Dad called.

We got up and chased each other down the stairs like little kids, laughing as we went. "Phil, hurry up! I'm gonna take all the pizza!" I teased. He ran faster than me and shoved me backwards, causing me to slip on my socks and hit my head on the stairs. I groaned in pain, but an idea popped into my head.

I covered my face with my hands and pretended to cry, and sure enough, Phil sat in front of me, concerned. "Sweetheart, I'm sorry-"

I shoved him sideways and he fell on the floor laughing as I jumped up and began running again. He reached out to grab my leg but missed. I hurried over to the kitchen and grabbed a slice of pizza, grinning from ear to ear as Phil walked in. Phil pouted, walking over and shoving me. I giggled and handed him a slice, sitting next to him on the couch.

We ate our pizza next to Audrey and she swallowed her bite of pizza, looking over at me. "Dan, do you remember the attic? Our fort?"

I stopped chewing to smile widely at her. "Is it still there?" I asked.

"Yep," she nodded. I jumped up, grabbing Phil's hand and following my sister up the ladder to our attic. "I never took it down. I always had hope you'd come back."

My eyes widened at the sight of sheets pinned to the wall, fairy lights strung around it. Our old stereo sat next to it quietly, along with our old stuffed animals, towels like a carpet- leading to the fort. The window let moonlight through, making the scene ten times prettier. Pillows sat in the fort and more blankets to sleep in and a few books with board games inside. "It's just how I remember it."

"Daniel, this pizza isn't going to finish itself! Bring it up there with you, would you?" Mum called from the livingroom. I looked at Phil and Audrey.

"Be right back," I told them. They nodded and I climbed back down, taking the pizza box from her and thanking her.

"So are you staying the night with Phil?" She questioned. I nodded. "I'll make pancakes for you two in the morning- your favourite."

I kissed her cheek. "Thanks mum. I love you," I told her. She looked down as her eyes began to water. "What? What is it?"

She wiped away her tears, smiling sadly as she stroked my cheek. "You haven't said that to me since you were little." I dropped my shoulders, grinning sympathetically at her. "Now go hang out with your family. Sleep well, okay?"

"I will," I promised her, and then began walking to the ladder when I heard my boyfriend and sister talking.

"Yeah, it's been awhile."

That was Audrey. What were they talking about?

"I bet. He had them off for a long time."

"Thank you for getting him back. The real Dan. He's just how I remembered- an amazing person and a good brother."

"Don't forget a good boyfriend," Phil chuckled. I smiled to myself, blushing slightly.

Audrey giggled. "He's crazy about you. I can tell. He's never looked at somebody the way he looks at you- not even when he had PJ."

It was quiet before he spoke up. "I'm crazy about him too," Phil replied. You could hear the sincerity in his voice. "The day I met him I knew he would be important in my life. The second I realized he had his emotions off all I wanted to do was help him, because I know what it's like. I turned off my feelings after my family passed away."

"All of them?" Audrey asked, shocked. It was quiet, so I assumed Phil nodded because she spoke again. "Oh my god. I'm sorry. But hey, you've got us. We're your family now. Even though I just met you, I know you'll make Dan happy and he better make you happy too. You're just as much his family as he is mine."

Phil giggled. "He does make me happy. The happiest person alive, in fact. I can just look at him and instantly feel better. He's my family now and I couldn't ask for a better one. I want to have a bigger family though, if you catch what I'm saying."

Now I was nonstop smiling. Audrey gasped. "You mean you plan on marrying him?"

"Yeah," Phil responded sheepishly. "I also want to adopt kids. I want to spend the rest of my life with him, Auds."

I then walked up, acting like I had heard nothing, setting the pizza box down in our fort and sitting in between Phil's lap, my back against his chest. He instantly wrapped his hands around me, kissing the back of my head. Audrey looked at me.

"You didn't hear anything, did you?" She questioned nervously. I forced a reassuring grin.

"No," I breathed. I turned away from them, closing my eyes sleepily. "Nothing at all."

But little did Phil know, I wanted to spend the rest of my life with someone too.

I wanted to spend the rest of my life with Phil Lester.