Silent Mind (z.h)

E I G H T E E N

Alright this one is so sad... I cried while writing it. I hope you will like it! 
Seriously listen to the song when I tell you too... it's almost unbeareable...
ENJOY!

”Niall, wake up my angel” A voice mused to my right. I fluttered my eyes open and met two brown, warm eyes. I smiled and adored his beautiful face for a while, I really was lucky.
He pecked my lips before rising from bed.

“It’s a very special day today my love” He said and picked up a tray he had put on the bedside table. A tray with breakfast and a little box beside the plate.
I looked into his eyes and met an excitement I rarely saw anymore. He was happy, and my heart fluttered to know that.

“What special day?” I asked and picked up the box and opened it. I gasped as I looked on a ring made of gold, one just like my wedding ring.
I looked up again, stunned for life.

“It’s our anniversary darling, I bought a ring just like the last one” He said and picked the ring up. He held my left hand out and put the ring on my finger.

I felt a tear of happiness fall down my cheek as I smiled like an idiot.
“Zayn…” I stuttered and threw myself at him, kissing him like never before.

We kissed, passionately and intensely. I wanted to mend with him, be one with him. I pulled him closer and dig my nails into his back.

He forced me down on my back and pinned me to the bed

I furred my eyebrows at what I just saw but kept going, never wanting to let go.

“I am going to kill you, Niall Horan” Zayn smirked and trapped my throat with his big hand, choking me.

“Zayn…” I mumbled as I felt like suffocating. Zayn mumbled a yes and caressed my cheeks with his hands.

“Please Zayn stop!” I pleaded, my voice hoarse and dry. He only kept smirking and leaned closer.
“Quiet”

“NO STOP!”

Zayn’s P.O.V ( SURPRISE! )

Niall pulled away from me quickly and crawled out of the bed, his big terrified eyes locked on me.
“Get away from me!” He screamed and looked around frantically.
“Niall?” I gasped as I realized, that it was happening again.

“NO! You are not going to kill me! I won’t let you destroy my life anymore!” He spat in hatred and opened the drawer in his bedside table to pick out a… knife.

I looked shocked on the blonde boy I loved with all of my life.
“No, Niall please” I stuttered, glancing at the sharp knife in his hand. He had a steady grip on it, but his whole body was trembling with fear.

“I am going to send you back to hell!” He growled and sprinted over the bed. I ran out the room to get the phone. I wasn’t going to let him hurt me and I wasn’t going to hurt him.

I ran for the phone that was on the table in the living room. I grabbed it and looked up to find Niall in the door.

“I won’t be quiet anymore!” He screamed and ran towards me, knife raised.
I ran around the table and towards the bathroom. Just as I was about to close it, I felt weight on the other side of the door, pushing it open. I pushed too with all of my might.

I got it closed and locked it before I sunk down on my knees. I dialed the number the doctor had given me if Niall was to have another attack.
I could hear my husband on the other side of the door, trying to get the door open.

“Hello, London’s psychiatric hospital” The woman on the other end answered.
“I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!” I heard Niall growl as he stabbed the knife into the door several times.

“I am calling because dr. Madison told me to call if my husband was to have another attack!” I panted in panic as I watched how Niall left mark after mark on the door.

“Is this Mr. Malik?” The woman asked.
“Yes!”
“There are people on their way, are you safe?” She asked me.
I gulped as Niall began kicking the door to get inside. “Yes, but not for long” I said and hung up.

I didn’t need to speak to her anymore, what was there to say?
My husband, the boy I loved was trying to kill me.

I looked back on the good days, when Niall was happy and healthy…
When everything was perfect. 

"""""(PLAY THE SONG HERE YOU WON'T REGRET IT! IT'S IN THE SIDEBAR!)""""

( “Look at the fish I caught Zayn!” Niall 7 years old laughed and showed up his one meter long perch proudly.

“Zayn do you want to go to the skate park today?” Niall 11 years old asked holding his favorite skateboard his real father gave to him.

“I am gay…” Niall 16 years old said with his eyes on his lap, sitting on one of the benches in Hyde Park.

“I love you too Zayn” Niall 19 years old replied with a smile of relief after I declared my love for him, both of us dancing under the disco ball in the gym hall.

“Yes of course I want to marry you, God I love you!” Niall cried in happiness as I had knelt down in front of him, holding a golden ring in my hand. )

The door was burst open and a rabid Niall with big, amazingly blue but murderous eyes looked down on me.
“Niall please listen to me” I said, panic stricken. I didn’t want to die, definitely not by the love of my life at least.

But he shook his head and advanced towards me, the knife in a hard grip.
“Niall, I love you! Please you gotta remember!” I felt the urge of crying, watching him so sick as he was.
“NO STOP IT!” He cried and pointed the knife on me.

“Niall, remember when we went out fishing and you got the biggest perth we’d ever seen?” I asked quickly, trying to save time.
Niall just looked down on me in silence.

“Remember when we danced at prom and I told you that I loved you?”
He furred his eyebrows and lowered the knife a little.
“Do you remember when I asked you to marry me?” I asked as I slowly got on my feet.

Niall blinked a few times and breathed slowly. It looked like was trying to remember, and I was praying he would.
A moment of silence lingered and he looked down on the tile floor in thoughts.

He then looked up on me, his murderous and wild eyes colored blue glared into my soul.
“I HATE you” He said and with the tone that made my heart break. I actually think my heart broke…
“No Niall… no” I said, a last light of hope was still glowing… but not for long.

“I HATE YOU!” He screamed and jumped on me. He stabbed me in the thigh and sent us both to the floor. At the same time I heard how the front door was burst open and how men yelled around in the house.

I looked up on Niall’s face, how the pain was visible but also a glimpse of remorse and actual … love.
“Zayn…” He cried and I watched how a tear fell down his cheek. He kept a grip on the knife that was deep into my thigh, creating a massive pain that was unbearable, but not as unbearable as the aching in my heart.

Niall was pulled off of me and he began screaming.
“I HATE YOU ZAYN! I HATE YOU!” He yelled and thrashed around in the grip of men in white uniforms.

“YOU PROMISED ME! YOU PROMISED YOU WOULDN’T LEAVE ME!” He cried and I broke down.

Niall was carried away screaming while I lay there, in so much pain… a pain that wouldn’t be possible to heal.
I could live without my leg… that was nothing.

I couldn’t live without Niall… I don’t know how…
“I love you Niall” I cried as I felt my vision get blurry. A saw how two men ran inside of the bathroom to help me.

“I’m sorry Niall” I whispered as I slowly closed my eyes. 

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Gooooood I am crying... Niall was like, in between the two states in the end if you didn't get it. 
OMG.