It's Only Logical | Big Bang Theory

The Whiskey Colloquy

The two cups of hot beverage rest confidently in my hands. The one in my right hand is for me, the one in my left for Raj. I must say, I rather enjoy it here. I didn't know anyone in town, but now I'm spending my lunch hours chatting about everything from the Marangoni effect to whether Green Lantern or The Flash would do best as a babysitter with the guys. The guys. Is it weird that I already refer to them as the guys? I've known them for a week, but I have a feeling that these are the kind of people I want to spend time with. Even Sheldon.

I barge through the door to Raj's office, surprised by these happy thoughts conquering my mind.
"Good morning, Rajesh," I say as I close the door with the help of my elbow. He's standing with his back turned.
"I bought coffee. I wasn't sure what you liked and I didn't have time to ask, and at the same time I was kind of afraid of being stereotypical, you know, so I got you coffee," I blurt, placing the cups on his desk and taking off my jacket.
"Well isn't that kind of you," a voice with an Indian accent sounds. I look up, dropping my jacket to the floor. Now what the hell. Raj turns around with a bottle and a glass in his hand. There is a look in his eyes that seems far from sober, kind of daring, together with a smile that looks both confident and charming. "And I will say good morning to you too, despite the fact that you are late," he says raising his eyebrows, leaving me standing there with a mouth hanging open, my eyebrows a bit furrowed by his slight hostility.
"Raj, are you drunk?" I ask. Stupid question. My happy thoughts seem distant. We've been working together for a week using our phones as our tool for communication, and to me this has worked much better than you would think. Why this sudden number?
"I don't know, Lucille Davenport, am I?" he asks, clutching the bottle. He walks to his desk and picks up the coffee. He brings it to his nose (which he wrinkles slightly) before pouring liquid from the bottle into it. I'm unable to speak. He stands in front of me.
"Let me close that for you," he says as he reaches up to touch my chin only to close the gap between my lips. In this moment I don't know whether to be sad for him or mad at him.
"So I'm guessing we won't be continuing our research today?" I ask, crossing my arms. Raj looks at me.
"Of course we will," he says as if it's obvious. Still with the cup of coffee in his hand he walks to the board where calculations and equations from previous days shine. Shine. Haha. What a bad astrophysics notion. Raj has picked up a marker which he tries to open with his mouth. I raise my eyebrows. As he spits out the lid, he turns around to look at me as to show off his great achievement.
"This one right here isn't right..." he begins. "It doesn't clearly distinguish the relationship between..." he continues as he takes another sip. The sip is a long one and enough to make him drop the marker. I sigh.
"Rajesh, stop it now," I say, walking to him and holding his shoulders.
"Why do you call me Rajesh? Usually that's just my mother and sometimes Sheldon, and neither is rarely in a good context," he pouts, trying to take another sip from which I stop him.
"Cool. Now you go sit in your chair, and I'll be back in a minute," I say, trying to get him to turn around.
"No, you cannot go. You're at work! For me!" he answers, stopping in his tracks.
"Rajesh Koothrappali, go sit in your chair or I swear to good Shiva, I will get both Sheldon and your mom," Raj looks at me for a second before his face turns into deep-felt horror. As soon as he sits, I turn towards the door, then back as I realise I should probably take away his bottle - that's all I get, he refuses to hand me his coffee. Cup is probably preferable to the bottle if anyone should come by, anyway.

I close the door behind me with a heavy sigh. Is this thing lockable? I put the bottle down. Anyhow, I need to find someone. Howard is his closest pal, but Leonard is probably the more responsible. He works at the labs. Might as well get walking then.
"Lucille!" a voice calls from behind. "Oh great!" It's Sheldon. He quickly reaches me, and before I can utter a word, he continues speaking his. "Did you know that the Marangoni effect is also known as the Gibbs-Marangoni effect..."
"Yes," I say. He raises a finger.
"Hey now, I'm not done!"
"Sheldon, I-"
"... or the thermo-capillary convection, or the Bénard-Marangoni convection," he says and looks at me with raised eyebrows and anticipating eyes. I look at him for a second.
"I actually did know that," I say, arms crossed. Sheldon looks back into my eyes, his not so anticipating anymore.
"Well aren't you a little bragger," he says, crossing his arms. I snort. Sheldon starts to walk away. Oh right, I have a purpose.
"Wait! Sheldon! I need your help," He turns around.
"On top of that bragging?" he asks. "Well... if it's something that will allow me to prove my superiority, continue," he continues. Wouldn't have been my first choice, but it'll do.
"Raj is drunk," I tell him. Sheldon looks at me, cocking his head a bit.
"All right,"
"... I need your help,"
"To do what?"
"To help your friend. We have to get him home," I retort. Sheldon walks closer to me.
"Miss Davenport, I think you're forgetting that I'm a busy individual with a rare, rare intellectual gift that needs to be nourished at any chance given," he explains to my face.
"So what were you doing when you stopped me just now?"
"Getting Milk Duds. Oh, darn!" he exclaims as I nod and we walk back towards Raj's office. "Why couldn't Wolowitz be drunk? Could've said no to that..."