INT. CAKE SHOP – DAY
Roy stands behind the counter of this delicious cake shop.
NARRATOR (V/O):
It's five to Steve and Mr. Mann is taking his daughter, Miss Girl, to a cake shop. I love cakes. I have a thousand caters making cakes for me because I just hate doing the hard work and I'm an old fart.
Then, like magic, Mr. Mann and his daughter Miss Girl appear straight in front of the counter.
ROY:
Oh, hello.
MR. MANN:
Hello.
MISS GIRL:
Hello.
ROY:
How did you get in here?
MR. MANN:
(Pointing to the front door) By opening that door.
ROY:
Right. So, how can I help you?
MISS GIRL:
Do you have any cakes with salt and pepper sponge with banana jam with chocolate icing and with the words: "To Miss Girl, the best girl in the world"?
ROY:
(Looks around) I can't see any here. Margaret knows all the cakes. One moment. (Steps back). MARGARET! MARGARET!
Roy and Mr. Mann exchanges smiles to each other.
MARGARET (V/O):
Yes?
ROY:
There's a gentleman and a very young woman here who wants to know if we have any cakes with salt and pepper sponge with banana jam with chocolate icing!
MISS GIRL:
With the words: "To Miss Girl, the best girl in the world".
ROY:
With the words: "To Miss Girl, the best girl in the world"!
MARGARET (OOV)
I don't know!
ROY:
She doesn't know.
MISS GIRL:
Oh.
ROY:
(To Margaret) Oh!
MARGARET (OOV):
We got a chocolate sponge cake with banana icing with strawberry cream!
ROY:
Oh, she says we got a chocolate sponge cake with banana icing with strawberry cream!
MISS GIRL:
What are you, sick?
ROY:
(To Margaret) What are you, sick?
MARGARET (OOV):
Yes! I've been throwing up in the toilet a lot!
Throwing up can be heard.
ROY:
Sorry about that. She'll get better soon.
Mr. Mann and Miss Girl just shudder.
MISS GIRL:
Do you have a chocolate cake with jam in it?
ROY:
I think we have just the thing.
Roy gets a perfectly good cake that fits her description and shows it to her.
ROY:
Well, what do you think?
MISS GIRL:
How much does it cost?
ROY:
We're doing a special offer by 35% which would bring it to only £13.90.
MISS GIRL:
Oh, I was hoping to spend around £13.75.
MR. MANN:
(To Roy) You see, she takes after her father.
ROY:
(Sighs) Yes! I can see that!
YOU ARE READING
A Brand New Little Britain Episode
FanfictionHere is my own Little Britain episode with my favourite characters in brand new sketches.
