EXT. KESLEY GRAMMAR SCHOOL – DAY
The bell rings and a lot of children run out of the school. As soon as they begin to talk or play ball or eat, the bell goes off again! The children sadly go back in.
NARRATOR (V/O):
Over at Kelsey Grammar School, Mr. Cleeves is teaching his class P.E.
INT. SPORTS CENTRE – DAY
Mr. Cleeves, in a white shirt and blue shorts and white trainers, is addressing the students, who are very much wearing the same uniform.
MR. CLEEVES:
Right, we'll start off with a few warm-ups. Let's jog on the spot.
The bored children do it easily, whereas Mr. Cleeves is out of breath already!
MR. CLEEVES (CONT'D):
(Panting) Right, let's move on the main sport. Today, we'll be doing... boxing! It's good for self-defence and you will show the muggers who are boss. Right, first volunteer. Clark?
Clark puts the boxing gloves on and walks to him. Mr. Cleeves punches him.
MR. CLEEVES (CONT'D):
Clark, you'll die if you just stand there like a statue! Johnson!
Johnson takes the boxing gloves, puts them on and walks to the teacher. Mr. Cleeves throws a punch, but Johnson blocks him off. Johnson keeps blocking off Mr. Cleeves's moves from the head and the stomach. Then Mr. Cleeves steps on his foot and punches Johnson in the stomach.
MR. CLEEVES (CONT'D):
Not bad, Johnson, but watch for your foot work. It can be your undoing. Meacher!
Meacher takes the boxing gloves and walks to the teacher.
LATER...
All the children are badly bruised and bandaged up! Mr. Cleeves is annoyed and angry.
MR. CLEEVES (CONT'D):
Oh, my god. That was disgraceful lesson. You'll have to do better than that if you want to survive and live on! Well, what do you have to say for yourselves?
The children just moan and groan. They can't speak properly.
MR. CLEEVES (CONT'D):
That's what I thought!

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A Brand New Little Britain Episode
FanfictionHere is my own Little Britain episode with my favourite characters in brand new sketches.