Scarred Hearts {NCIS}

Chapter 1

Tonys POV.

We are finishing up a case, a Marine and his family went missing. The Marine was found shot execution style, in a dumpster. The family, a little girl and mother, were killed in a warehouse fire. I knew Gibbs was broken up about this from the beginning, and even more now. He is remembering Shannon and Kelly. I would not think that Ziva would be so torn up about this, yes it's sad and depressing. But Ziva is such a strong woman, she hates to show emotions to others.

"Want to get a drink later" I ask Ziva

"No Tony, I'm tired, I need sleep" she responds back.

"Okay miss David" I reply

Then Gibbs came into the bullpen, and told us to go home. Ziva got up and ran into the elevator. I got really worried, why did she act like that?

"Boss do you know why-" I go to ask

"Lila, she looked a lot like Tali" Gibbs cut into my sentence

Memories are catching her off guard, that's why she's acting so depressed. I need to make sure she's okay.

"DiNozzo, do I have to drag you home, or are you going to leave?" Gibbs snaps

"Yah I'm leaving" I respond

I grab my stuff and walk to the elevator, memories of Kate came to my mind, Ari. I was right next to Kate, I should have seen something that day. I guess everything has a reason to happen. I now have my wonderful Ziva in my life, that's a good thing.

I decide to go home and watch a movie instead.

Ziva's POV

After the long day of memories that I've just had, I'm tired, depressed, and I want to go home. Tony wants me to go drinking with him, any other night than tonight. After Gibbs told us we could go home, I left there as soon as I could. Yes I was going home, but sleep that doesn't come to easily lately. I went home and changed into a baggy sports tee shirt, and some shorts. I was looking at every scar on my body, and there were a lot. I curled up on my bed, and I cried a lot, memories of Tali came into my mind. Me finding my little sister like that.

I sat up and grabbed the shiny, sharp razor blade from my bed-stand. I sat in my bed with my legs curled up near my chest. I watched the light bounce off of the razor, I was stuck in a trance, it was so beautiful. I dragged the sharp blade against my left wrist. I loved watching my blood seep to the surface. Its the most numbing feeling I know of.

Then a couple little cuts, became deeper and longer, and those became more and more. I was addicted, All that went trough my head was. My dad, me killing Ari, me finding Tali killed by a suicide bomber. I wanted her to grow up, what would she be like today, would she be like Ari and my dad, or me? Kate, she came into my mind. What was she like. I never got to meet her, but it feels like I know her. Would we have met If my brother hadn't killed her ? I would have never had to kill him then. By the time all these thoughts had ended and my cutting had stopped, my whole arm was soaked in blood. I was really weak, did I do it? Am I going to die?!? The My eyes flickered shut.

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