In This Life ○ Paul Lahote

Fourteen

Once I bring the boys back to Emily's house they all jump out and run into the woods.
"Don't wait up, I'm on watch until three in the morning." He says and I nod before planting a kiss on his lips.
"Be safe okay?" I ask and he nods and smiles before taking off his shirt and shoes and socks and jumping out of the truck.
"I'll park your car here!" I shout after him and he waves his hand before he disappears into the woods. I grab his clothes and fold them all up before putting my shoes on and grabbing his own. I jump out of the truck and lock the doors before jumping in the box and folding up all the other boys' clothes and putting their shoes with them and then carrying them all inside. I smile at Emily who grins at me as Sam runs back into the house in only shorts.
"We're going to need to pull Quill and Jacob from school tomorrow, Paul and Jared will trade off with them when they get back so they'll have a longer shift tonight." Sam sighs and hugs Emily.
"Why do you..." He mumbles.
"The boys left their clothes in the truck, it's supposed to rain tonight so I took them in." I say and he smiles and thanks me. I nod and run back out to grab their bags. I take Paul's stuff up to my room and go through it to see what he has to do for homework. I find it all and set to work on it, copying his hand writing as closely as I could. He won't have enough time for it and I'm sure his grades are suffering. It's amazing what these boys have to sacrifice to save the people who don't trust them. Once I was done I set it on my vanity, wipe off my make up and change into running clothes. I jog down the stairs and just as I was about to leave, Sam grabs my wrist. I look to his grave expression and then at Emily who looked just as serious.
"Tonight's not the best time for a run. Boys are hunting. I'm going back out in about an hour." Sam says and I feel my heart race and I nod a little and he lets go.
"Will they be okay?" I ask him and he nods with a proud look in his eye.
"My pack's smart. They won't get hurt." He decides and I nod again before looking at my shoes.
"Is it okay if I go to the school? I saw a track there." I ask him and he doesn't respond. "Backyard? Until you have to leave, then I'll come inside." I tell him and he nods. I nod a little and go to the fenced in backyard but my beloved woods don't look as mystical any more. They look maniacal, as if black fear was oozing from every leaf. I feel the goosebumps shatter across my skin before I plug in my ear buds and work on planks and push ups and sit ups and crunches. An hour later, Sam calls me in. I look to him in hesitation before glancing at the woods and making my way in the house. He leaves shortly after and I walk over to Emily who gives me a sympathetic expression.
"Can I do anything?" I ask and she nods, knowing that I need to be doing something to keep my mind off of the probable danger Paul is in.
"The living room needs cleaning. The supplies are in the closet under the stairs." She tells me and I nod and set to work. After a couple minutes Emily turns on some music but not loud enough to drown out outside noises, it's more like background noise.
Three hours later, we had the whole main floor cleaned spotless.
"The first night is always the hardest. First couple weeks actually. It doesn't really get easier but you learn how to sleep." Emily says quietly as we sit down and I nod but I didn't have the confidence in my action.
"He told me not to wait up." I smile a little and take a deep breath. I hear Emily take a deep breath and nod.
"Why don't you try laying down, you never know." She says. "It's already pretty late." She says and I nod and smile to her.
"I'll go take a shower." I say quietly and she nods before I walk up the stairs and go straight into the bathroom. I take a deep breath before stripping and putting on a hot shower. After I was nice and warm and clean and shaved, I make my way into my bedroom, blow dry my hair and put coconut oil on. I slip into a black long sleeve and grey pajama shorts with white lace on the bottom and slip my feet into white furry slipper boots. I put a white bandana on my head to keep my hair away from my face and I make my way back downstairs and curl up on the sofa. Emily walks in with a big bowl of popcorn and nods towards the movies. I smile a little and pick out a couple I've been wanting to watch for a while. I've never been able to sit through a whole movie, they've always been too long.
"Can we watch this one first?" Emily asks and I nod and pop it in for us. She fixes everything and we each take over a corner of the sofa and balance the bowl of popcorn between us.
"You don't have to stay up with me if you're tired." I tell Emily and look over to her to see a small smile on her lips and she takes a deep breath.
"It's nice with you, the other girls are nice, Kim's in the same grade as Jared and Claire is my toddler niece, Quill is her babysitter. You're the only other imprintee my age and it's nice. To have someone my age I can talk to, really talk to." She confides in me and I nod a little, looking down at my hands before looking back up at her.
"Was Sam the first..." I trail off and she nods, taking a deep breath.
"That's why he's the Alpha. He was supposed to step down once Jacob phased, he's the blood of our ancestor's Alpha, but he didn't want the responsibility." Emily tells me and I nod, digesting the new information. I guess it's good that he isn't Alpha, he is just a kid after all, sixteen at most.
"How did you handle it? Being... imprinted on." I teeter off into nothing and she chuckles and scratches the back of her neck.
"Not that well." She admits before eating a handful of popcorn. I grab a fistful and chew one piece at a time.
"At the time, Sam was in a relationship with my closest cousins, Leah. We were the best of friends, practically sisters. Anyway, Leah invited me down because she finally wanted me to meat the boy she was madly in love with." She recanted and I could feel my heart straining for her and Leah. Leah who shattered completely in distrust and Emily who was too guilt ridden to accept the love of her soul mate.
"He ended it with Leah and tried pursuing me but the moment that happened I left... being away though made me very ill, I couldn't get out of bed, when I ate I'd throw it back up, Billy Black knew this would happen of course, and came to bring me back. Once there and being around Sam's constant worrying day and night, I felt like a new person. Then he told me about everything and we could never tell Leah." She breathes, her face falling expressionless. We look at the moving scenes but don't really pay attention to the movie.
"Can I ask you something?" Emily breaks the silence and I look over to the unscarred side of her face.
"Sure." I reply.
"Why'd you date that guy? Rick?" She asks and I smile a little and look out the window, resting my chin in my hand. I take a deep breath, trying to remember what I can about Rick. Ever since Paul it's become difficult to think about other men. I can't remember Rick's face that well, just a general outline.
"I guess..." I start, trying to find the right words. "he was the only one who could put up with me. I couldn't go on dates that involved sitting for too long, I couldn't meet families without seeming rude because I'd always have to make it short so I could run. I don't get along with a lot of people because I figure them out too quickly as well. I guess he just really liked the sex, I felt bad that we couldn't be the couple I truly wanted to be so I had sex with him a lot. And since I couldn't keep still I was usually the one doing all the work." I reply but I couldn't look at her.
"I was used to being lonely so... it was Rick or nothing I guess." I try and explain with a small smile on my face. I still refused to look at Emily, I don't want to see the pity on her face.
"But Paul?" I add, my mind not being able to stay away from him for too long. I blow out some air and shake my head a little, grinning as I look away from the window and looking up at the ceiling.
"I don't deserve a kid like him." I smirk a little. "I feel bad you know? A little guilty but at the same time I'm ecstatic. My heart doesn't hurt anymore. I don't wake up to the feeling that I'm going to die today. When I wake up I think of him and my heart beats a little stronger. He cherishes me and I can sit for hours just thinking about him. I don't know a damn thing about him and he knows even less about me. He's seventeen and already knows I'm the one." I shake my head in disbelief. "It's amazing and terrifying and I have the power to protect him and destroy him. I'm not good enough for him yet." I rant and look to Emily who's face was red and eyes wide in surprise. I grin with eyes I hadn't realized were watering. My nose stings as my eyes tear over so much I can't see anything clearly.
"So I'll try my hardest to be the best me I can be. Maybe then I won't feel so guilty."