life is ok - a Life is Strange parody

6 Chloe Elizabeth Comstock

(Quick notes: 1) before shit goes down in the next chapter, I wanted to know if you guys would like to read about the Vortex Party, maybe tea parties with Kate, going ape with Warren, etc? 2) the characters in this story are MEANT TO BE rlly ooc, or over exaggerated versions of themselves. It is a parody, after all.)

I walked into the diner. It was, as usual, filled with many unpleasant people. Arcadia Bay didn't have the biggest selection of America's most desired aristocrats like Nathan or Victoria, but it's still home.

Even though it was Chloe who kept bugging me about getting to diner in time, she was late. Typical Chloe Price behaviour. She texted me to get a booth at the diner, and that Joyce would feed me. I sat a couple booths away from a group of two. It didn't take long for Joyce to skip over to me.

"There she is--lovely young woman. How are you doing, Max?" She asked cheerfully. Unlike Chloe, she moved on from William's death. Moved on to some douche, too.

"Hi Joyce, it's nice to see you again. You look the same," I replied. Nobody from the Price family acted as if I was gone for ages, even though I was, and that was fine by me.

"Like I'm still a waitress at Two Whales after all these years?" Yes. I mean, are you not?

"No," I lied. "Like you still look pretty," too bad you're wasting time on Madsen. Could've found a sugar daddy by now. You've got the looks, or had.

"Nice save, kid," I am eighteen, are you kidding? "You're still smart," well I am older, wouldn't expect me to still act thirteen. Shudder. "But not that smart," excuse ME, I am basically the new Jesus with my time rewind powers. And you're bout to go to hell. "Now you get busted for having an orgy," how nice will that look on my spotless Blackwell record? "I heard the whole sordid story from David. I'm sorry this was how you had to meet him. He's a good man, no matter what Chloe says."

"I'm sure," all lies, I hated David. "I don't even have orgies...like ever. It was almost an accident. Very stupid. I'm sorry."

"It surprised me fierce. I was hoping you could be a good influence in her life now..."

"I will be," hahahahahahaha. "Promise."

"So, now let's get down to the nitty-gritty. What do you want to eat?" The hardest question I have ever been asked in my entire life.

"The last good Belgian waffle I had here when I was thirteen years old. So, bring it on," good enough.

"Now finish your coffee," Joyce walked off to get me my order, while Chloe was still gone. Ten out of ten for even trying to get here, Che. Some drunk ass came along and changed the music. Bleugh. He continued to complain about how Joyce wouldn't serve him beer. At the edge of the table, there was nerd graffiti. Leave it up to Warren to ruin public property in the most geeky way. At Blackwell, there's some interesting stuff written on walls behind the school about Warren, too. "Warren Gayram," "Warren = Genius of my ass" wonder who wrote those (nathan prescott). Finally, Joyce came along with the waffles.

"Still can't believe you're a woman, Max," what did you expect me to be, a sock? "When I look at pictures of Chloe-" who had just decided to join us.

"Speak of the devil," she fist-bumped some dude, walking over to us.

"Mom and Max, together again!" About fucking time she got here. I didn't even get to eat my breakfast though.

"And Chloe, looking for a free meal. You've put your whole damn college fund on your tab," ain't that the truth. She did attend Blackwell, surprisingly. She's not an artsy, or science-y person.

"I'm treating Chloe for breakfast," might as well be nice.

"Are you atoning for yesterday?" Nevermind, Chloe can pay. Screw that, I'm paying and getting talked shit at? Wowser. Chloe started giving out to her mom for lecturing me. Joyce walked off, telling Chloe she's getting only one slice of bacon. Chloe decided to finally change the shitty music on the jukebox. I think, out of anybody, I should tell Chloe about my powers. She'll probably kill me trying to get proof that I'm magical.

"Chloe," even though Chloe's not straight, you had to be straight up with her. "I have time travelling powers."

"Max, are you fucking high?" That is the exact reaction I expected.

"I can prove it. I can tell you everything that is in your pockets."

"Is your power x-Ray vision, dude? I don't even know what's in my pockets!" She checked, without showing me, obviously. "Okay. Impress me."

"I have to see them first, you fucking moron."

"Do you even have powers or not?" She took everything out. "That was beyond epic fail..." Blah blah blah, you suck Max, I have more powers than you, blah blah.

Rewind

"Okay, impress me," I began to flawlessly list off the things in her pockets, half of which she forgot herself.

"Holy shit, my girlfriend has super powers!" Hold the fuck up, I am like, the most wanted right now in all of Arcadia Bay. A guy sitting at the counter started talking, to us I think, about some fairy hooker he met one time that he also thought had super powers. Very intriguing. Just like Romeo and Juliet. Still a better love story than twilight. I could truly see myself in that tale of the fairy hooker. I should talk to more people, those are some interesting stories.

To crash our little celebration of my awesome time rewind powers, the spoiled blonde Victoria paced over to us.

"So I heard you called Maxine your girlfriend," that was half a minute ago when Miss Chase was nowhere to be seen. Maybe I am not the only one with super powers around here. The power tsundere. Chloe looked at me, mouthed 'she's pretty hot' and then looked at the blonde again. She looked at me again. She mouthed 'are you gonna hit or not because I-' Victoria cleared her throat.

"I'm here," she glared at Chloe midway, "because I wanted to see if you're busy on Saturday too because maybe you could hang out with me, Nathan, you know the gang--"

"I'm busy," I seemed to always be surprising Victoria. She gave me the craziest look.

"It's not everyday Victoria Chase asks you out, cancel your other thing!" she shouted.

"Eh," I gave a simple reply. Honestly, if she asked me this only a week ago I would agree in one second flat, but she doesn't compete with Warren in the least. Bros over hoes, I said it before, I'll say it again.

"Can I come too?" She blurted out after a couple of seconds. What.

"Hey, if she can come, I'm coming too!" Chloe added. If I was Warren, I'd be pretty fine with three girls watching movies with me instead of one.

"It doesn't matter as long as I'm doing things with you," Victoria said under her breath. My thinking was disturbed by a call from Kate. She didn't sound okay. What the fuck was going down at the school?

In the next entry...

"The party for the end of the world!"
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"People will die."
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"Of fun!"
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"And of murder."