The Grey In His Eyes! Dramoine Story (Draco & Hermione)

Chapter 24 ~ Already

 

Three days was all it had been. Three bloody days. It had been a mere seventy-two hours and Draco had already cracked. He hadn't even noticed how attached he'd grown to Granger before he had left. Without her around him, there was a large, gaping hole in his chest. He felt numb and lifeless. He had thought before that his eyes were as heavy and cold as eyes came; but he was so wrong. Every trace of spark left in them was gone. Every trace of spark in everything was gone.

He did two things; help the Order and drown himself in firewhiskey. But he was never attentive in meetings, unless he was asked a question of importance. His mind was on Granger, on her safety. She could have easily been killed or tortured by then, and he wouldn't have had the slightest clue. So that was where his mind stayed. In a constant limbo between war and Granger. He thought they were two different things, until he really pondered the matter. It was then that he realized they weren't so different at all.

He lay in Granger's old bed and drank until he couldn't even feel the pounding hangover he had from the night before. He had needed the firewhiskey to sleep. But that was a goal. Drown it all out until he felt nothing. It was his second most successful way of coping.

He didn't think that anyone would give a shit that he hadn't come out of his room, or that he was going through four large bottles of firewhiskey a day. He wanted it that way. Unfortunately, he didn't have much luck getting what he wanted.

He was unsure which was more annoying; Weaselette's petty attempt to care, or the bloody knocking on his door that was like a knife into his skull each time.

"Fuck off" he slurred.

But the door opened anyways. Damn her. Maybe the rumors were true that gingers had no souls.

She looked cross, even for Ginny Weasley. Her brown eyes were narrowed and her normally perfectly straight, perfectly smooth red hair was askew. She was still in her pajamas, and he envied her for being able to sleep without drinking; the sunlight streaming in through the windows was really beginning to hurt his head. She glowered at him for a few more moments before speaking. "Get out of bed, Malfoy".

The blonde arched an eyebrow. "And why the hell should I do that?"

"Do you think Hermione would've wanted you locked away, moping about how she was gone?"

He knew Granger wouldn't want that, so he said nothing. He didn't want to lie where she was concerned, and he certainly didn't want to admit being wrong. Because he was a Malfoy, and Malfoys were always right, even if they were wrong.

"Look, I know I haven't been the kindest to you -

"Or anyone else here for that matter, Wea-

She raised her voice to block out his interruption. "But I still don't want to see the man Hermione Granger loves becoming a pathetic bum who drowns himself in firewhiskey".

"You wouldn't understand" he snapped. "You haven't been through this. You haven't lost someone so dear to you".

"I've lost Harry" she replied coolly. "In case you don't remember, he was captured for a few weeks... much longer than three days".

"You wouldn't fucking get it, Weasley" he slurred onward after taking another swig of his coping mechanism. "You wouldn't get what it was like. You give a shit about people besides Harry -

"Because I'm normal" she interrupted.

He smirked. "Yes, Weasley. We all know about how bloody mad I am. Everyone's gone mad, though. It's not just me. And besides, you're friends with Loony Lovegood herself" he said smugly. "But as I was saying, before you interrupted me, you give a shit about more than one person. You have things that help you cope, people actually give a shit whether you're happy or not. All I have is her. You feel alive all the time. There's color in your life. You smile all the time, you laugh all the time. Answer something for me, have you ever seen me smile outside of the presence of Granger?"