I Fucking Hate Emotions

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"Emmie! Babe, you here?"

"Jimmy? What is- oh my god! Is that Briar?"

"Yeah, get some towels!"

"Baby, what happened?"

"Briar said Zacky cheated on her. I...I'm just not sure what to think."

"Oh no...Bri...do you think he did?"

"Well, I know one thing. I've never seen Briar like this. I'm...well, I'm scared for her. And Zack's one of my best friends. I don't want to think he'd do that to her."

"I know, baby, but whatever happened, we need to support them, Briar especially. There's just always been something that told me she was very fragile; maybe it was the rough personality, or that pain that's always in her eyes, but..."

"I know what you mean. But it'll be okay, don't cry. I love you, baby, and we'll help them through this."

"I love you, too, Jimmy."

I listened to their conversation dully and expressionlessly as I laid in Jimmy's arms, my face pressed aginst his warm chest, my tears and soaked hair seeping through his shirt. Soon, I was laid down on the couch, wrapped in towels that were quickly dampened from my wet body. I laid facing away from them, my mind blank and my heart on autopilot. I couldn't bring myself to move, as though I'd turned all my senses off just to escape the pain. Actually, that's exactly what had happened.

This had happened once before, when I was young. It was right after the accident, when they had placed me in a foster home. I didn't move for days, my body and mind turned off. They tried to talk to me, get me to blink, anything. No one succeeded. Finally, after weeks of not eating, I made my way weakly downstairs to get lunch. I had been stared at as I entered, a blank expression on my face, grabbed an apple, and left again. I had been seven.

I suppose it was simply my way of coping with emotional pain. Honestly, it got to a point where I didn't know how long I'd been laying there. I was simply dead, my life itself having gone numb. I guess all that's left to do is see where this dark emptiness takes me. For once, I didn't care how vulnerable and how exposed I was to the world. My mind kicked in long enough to form a single thought:

Someone take me away from here.

€€€€€€€ In the end, as you fade into the night, who will tell the story of your life....]]]]]]]]]]]

No POV

Matt and Brian walked straight into Zacky's house, not bothering to knock. They had been called separately by Jimmy and the situation was explained. They agreed that they would confront Zacky and Johnny would go help comfort Briar with the rest of the girls.

"Do you think he really did it?" Brian had asked on the way over. Matt had shrugged.

"I don't know," he had replied. "But if he did, I won't hesitate to kick his ass."

"No," Brian disagreed. "He was in love with Briar...maybe it's all just a misunderstanding." Matt didn't reply.

As they walked into the house, they were hit by the smell of cigarettes. Sharing a glance, they continued to the living room. There, they saw Zacky curled up on the couch. He was staring straight ahead, not bothering to acknowledge their presence. After a moment, Brian spoke.

"So, is it true?" he asked. Zacky nodded slowly, his eyes red and swollen. He'd been crying.

"I woke up next to some slut with that on my forehead," he mumbled half heartedly, gesturing to the sticky note on the table. "I broke my promise. I told her I'd always protect her, and I do this. How could I?"

"I don't know, Zack. How could you?" Matt replied harshly, his large arms crossed angrily. "We just came from Jimmy's, man. She's not just upset, she's broken." Zacky sat up, running his hands through his dirty, messy raven hair.

"I hurt her so bad, man," he said, speaking around the lump in his throat. "I don't even fucking remember what happened last night. I just remember drinking with you and Jason, and then, waking up with that...that whore! I...I just..." Tears began to leak from his green eyes. "I love Briar. I love her so much...so much it hurts."

Brian and Matt felt their anger towards Zacky fall away as they understood. Zacky was just as heart broken as Briar.

"Then tell her, dude," said Brian. "I mean, it wasn't your fault. You were drunk and that bitch took advantage of you-"

"That's no excuse!" he suddenly yelled. "Being drunk doesn't justify what I did! And no, I won't talk to her." He paused. "I don't deserve forgiveness."

"Woah, dude, that's a little harsh," Matt insisted. "Sure, you fucked up, but Briar'll forgive you." But Zacky shook his head.

"I...I don't know if I want her to," he mumbled. Brian and Matt looked at each other. Brian turned back to Zacky.

"She was crying," he stated simply. Zacky's head shot up, his gaze finding Brian's. He looked shocked and scared. "Jimmy said when he found her, she was sobbing. But when we were there, she was just...dead to the world. Wouldn't even blink." Zacky suddenly shot up from his seat.

"No," he whispered, green eyes wide. " No no no no!" Zacky started pacing, his hands on his head. "I know what she's doing. She turning off her mind. She won't move for weeks. No eating, sleeping, nothing. I...I can't let her do that to herself..." he trailed off uncertainly.

"Then talk her out of it," said Matt, placing a large hand on Zacky's shoulder. They looked at each other for a moment before Zacky finally nodded. He would talk to her.

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Briar POV again

I heard the door open and close, but didn't bother to make any acknowledgement. It was probably one of the girls again; they'd been trying to talk to me a lot. No, it was moe than one person, judging by the footsteps. Soon, the couch beside me dipped and a hand began to softly stroke my hair lovingly. Suddenly, all my senses kicked in again, all at once. I knew that touch.

Zacky.

With incredible speed, my body snapped up, acting on instinct, and my fist connected with Zacky's jaw. He flew back off the couch, his back hitting the opposite wall. Emmie and AnnaMae both let out small screams of surprise; they hadn't see me move for hours.

When Zacky recovered from the punch, he looked up at me with sad, broken green eyes. I was standing now, panting through gritted teeth and fists clenched by my sides. I pushed away the grief and let familiar rage consume me, letting it overcome the pain. We stared at each other, tears leaking down my cheeks agin.

Nobody spoke or moved for a long while. Finally, Zacky stood from the floor and opened his mouth to speak.

This should be fun.

*^<*^>^*>+]{+^~>^+]{}^>+]~+\^}>^+\}>~^+>+^\>^+}^\+><+^\}><

*evil smirk*

How much do you hate me?

WELL DONT! Cuz I WUV you all <3

I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Be sure to comment and vote and add to reading lists and such ^.^

This chapter is dedicated to MissReverend so that she'll HURRY THE FUCK UP WITH HER STORY! Love you anners :p

COMMENT VOTE ADD AND FOLLOW!

Til next time!

Cucumber butt

~LooneyLuna

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