Just Once (Book 1 in the Just Once Series)

Chapter Twenty

One Week Later:

Brook’s POV:

All week Rick has been texting me and calling me; leaving me voicemails.

Jack was getting seriously pissed off with it all, though he didn’t know the full extent of the situation, but Rick had begun following me around the college like some damn stalker.

Larissa knew, because she witnessed it first hand, but Jack and I hadn’t really had a chance to talk about it. I wanted to tell him, but over the last week, I had put a little distance between us.

I had taken to sleeping in my own bed, alone. I hardly allowed him to touch me since the day in the classroom and if I was honest, I hadn’t kissed him in a few days either.

Now, as we drove to college, I kept my gaze averted from his. It was killing me, pulling away from him, distancing myself from him. It hurt.

But I didn’t want to hurt my mum or Nate; I didn’t want to hurt Jack anymore than I had to either. If I broke things off now, it would hurt less. At least, that’s what I told myself, but I couldn’t seem to bring myself to leave him.

Every time I thought I could, he’d do something and break me. Last night, he’d come into my room and I’d faked sleep.

He’d sat down next to me, brushed my hair back off my face gently and kissed my forehead, he whispered that he loved me and then he left.

It was so hard, so painful, and I wasn’t sure how much more I could take.

“Brook, we need to talk,” he said now and I looked towards him, keeping my eyes trained on his neck, instead of his beautiful icy blue eyes.

“About what?” I asked stupidly.

“Damn it, Brook, stop doing this. You either love me or you don’t,” he snapped now and I closed my eyes.

“You know it’s not that simple,” I whispered gently.

“And you know you have to make a decision. I don’t want you to, but you seem set on doing so,” he muttered now and I turned away from him.

“They will make us choose,” I defended now and he sighed heavily.

“You’ve already chosen, Brook,” he whispered now. So softly, I thought I’d misheard, but I hadn’t. I looked at him then, his eyes searching mine as we stopped at the lights.

“Jack...”

“You chose them before you even came me a chance,” he cut in and I shook my head.

“You’re wrong,” I whispered tearfully.

“Am I? So why won’t you let me touch you or hold you? Why won’t you let me kiss you and love you the way I know you want me to?” he demanded now as he ripped his gaze from mine and moved forwards with the traffic.

“Because it’s wrong... we’re...”

“NO! You’re lying and you don’t even seem to realise it! You got over the whole ‘wrongness’ ages ago! What you can’t get over, is the fact you don’t want to lose your mum and I get that! I do, but for god’s sake, Brook, if you are going to leave me, then do it now, because I can’t do this anymore! It hurts too fucking much!” he shouted loudly and I flinched softly, knowing he spoke the truth.

“I can’t!” I screamed loudly in anger and he took a turn sharply, pulling up on the side of the road and turning to me.

“I won’t leave you, Brook, I can’t, so if you don’t want this, if you don’t want me, then you leave me,” he said angrily and I lost it.