It's complicated

HeShe

Just in case you all haven't yet realised, the italics are thoughts.
I will hopefully have a few Christmas/New Years chapters coming up. I know it's already past Christmas but I think that maybe some Jane and Jake in a Christmas setting could be cute! Xx

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"Mom?"
Lauren clutched a small wooden tray, pushing her back against the bedroom door to open it just about enough to squeeze through.
"Lauren?"
Jane rubbed her eyes and began to frantically look around the room.
Where is he?
"Mom?" Lauren frowned and raised her hand to Jane's forehead when she got no answer.
"It was...it was just a dream" Jane quickly caught her breath and pulled Lauren's hand back from her forehead "nothing to worry about darling" she shook her head.
"Your burning up" Lauren sighed as she rested the tray on Jane's outstretched legs "your basically stuck to the bed. What the hell were you dreaming about?"
Lauren's friendly, amused smile slowly started to fade when she stared deep into her mom's eyes. Suddenly she no longer wanted to know the contents of this dream. She opened her mouth but only a rather small "oh" escaped her lips.
"Anyway" she changed the subject as quickly as she had carelessly slipped onto it "I made you some tea and toast" she stated proudly.
If Lauren was proud of a bit of tea and toast, she should've seen what delicious delicacies Jane was creating at her age.
"Reynaldo phoned" Lauren poured Jane a fresh cup of tea. Something was going on.
"The bakery isn't run to the ground without you" she smirked "but he said that your presence would be appreciated"
"Did he em.....say anything else?" Jane muttered as her hand took its place over the left side of her face.
The 'Janey' customary look of dread.
"About what?" Lauren raised an eyebrow, helping herself to a sip of Jane's tea.
Thank god.
"Nothing.....just whether it's busy....etc etc" Jane's voice began to fade out as her left hand slowly slipped off her face and fell back down to her side again.

Silence passed between them, each of them stealing glances when they thought the other wasn't looking. Each waiting for the other to speak.
"Mom...I" Lauren muttered after what felt like an hour "well....I'm sorry" she took a seat on the end of Jane's bed "what you do in your house in your free time is nobodies business....especially not mine. Trisha, Joanne, Diane and I shouldn't have waited on you, we shouldn't of even had the cheek to stay in the first place"
Jane's eyes immediately darted away from Lauren as guilt began to overcome her.
"I guess I just saw the look of pure joy in you eyes and wanted to.....investigate.....you know?" Lauren chuckled to herself, turning her face so that their eyes would meet. "I saw that you were happy for once, we all did. I want you to be happy and I guess I thought that you might share it with me"
Jane felt her throat tighten again, as if she was suddenly being strangled by her own lies. Jake could charm the birds out of the trees but she had no idea how he was going to pull her out of this great, big hole of guilt. But he always finds a way, doesn't he?
"...but now I realise.." Jane immediately zoomed back to the present when she realised that Lauren was still talking. "....Now I realise that if I were in your position I would tell no one in fear that they could somehow 'burst my bubble' or maybe I would tell no one just because I would be afraid of their reaction...."
Fuck she knows.
"Really all I want to say is that what ever makes you happy, makes me happy" Jane realised that her hand was firmly wrapped in Lauren's by the time her daughter had finished her little speech.
"That sounded more like something I should be saying to you" Jane commented, covering her mouth as soon as she realised that the words had left her mouth before they had time to go through the 'eliminate all dribble' section of her brain.
"Well" Lauren smirked, tucking a small piece of hair behind her ear.
Jane shrugged at the silence before grabbing a piece of toast and shoving it into her mouth.
She knows and hasn't hit the roof yet, hasn't jumped out of the window, smashed a few plates or even crashed a car yet. Ok, maybe not the last one. But she knows and we haven't even engaged in a screening match yet....wait, she does know, doesn't she?
Jane raised an eyebrow at her daughter in disbelief. The girl she knows would never take this so calmly.
"I just hope that she makes you very happy"
At this Jane chocked. There is no other fancy, glammed up way to describe it; she chocked.
Fuck maybe Lauren doesn't know.
She laughed that hard it turned into coughing fits. The fact that an image of Jake dressed up in drag made its way into her head, just made things one hundred times worse.
"You" Jane started to calm down when Lauren began to rub her back "you...what?!"
"I don't understand"
"Neither do it" Jane rubbed the side of her neck "honey if I was.....that way inclined, I would tell you!"
"But Trisha said...." Lauren stuttered.
"One night. One night you spent with the three gossipers of Santa Barbara. Please tell me that they haven't already started to fill your innocent little head with nonsense" Jane sighed. She wasn't surprised that a night with Trisha, Diane and Joanne had filled her daughters head with all different types of ideas, questions and General information.
Which information....something she most defiantly doesn't want to know.
"Mom I'm twenty five!"
"I know darling but the three of them are thirty years older than you.....not that that matters, anyway, they always did come out with purer shit than what circles around the sewers!"
Lauren didn't agree.....but then again, she didn't disagree.
"Dare I ask what else they told you?" Jane raised an eyebrow.
"Just about you know....you and dad"
Jane's eyes widened in surprise whereas Lauren simply shrugged it off. In her world it was all history.
Some pasts can be dug up and revisited. But Lauren doesn't know that, and as for everyone else......neither do they.

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"Jane" Reynaldo sighed in relief, balancing plates in his hands as he kicked a door open with his foot.
"Reynaldo I am so sorry I lay down for a while and then Lauren didn't wake me up then I had to sort Trisha, Diane and Joanne out and I thought....."
"Jane Jane...." Reynaldo placed a hand on her shoulder, worried that if she didn't take a breath soon she would faint right before his eyes. "You need to breathe"
"Breathe" Jane repeated with a smile "I know" she sighed "I..."
"Before you say anything..." Reynaldo took his hand and placed it on Jane's other shoulder "I have made Mr Adler quite comfortable in your office" he took her coat with a smile.
"Mr Adler..?" Jane repeated, immediately tearing her eyes away from Reynaldo, she looked beyond him, over his shoulder and to the open blinds of her office. It was there she saw a tall, handsome, smiling figure with a raised hand, giving her one of his signature small waves.

Jacob Adler

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