Kylo Ren's weakness - a Kylo Ren love story (kyloRenxreader)

True feelings of the Sith

After he had gone and left me to my thoughts, I had cried and cried into the early hours of the morning, barely sleeping. I wish I had never gotten into this mess. Soon it was morning, and I knew I had to get up. Sighing I climbed into a shower and scrubbed hard at my body, trying to remove anything left from him. I washed my face, feeling slightly fresher without all the dried tears caking my skin. Once I had got out and dressed, I decided to go get some breakfast, I could do with some food to settle this nauseating feeling in my stomach. Once breakfast was over I walked to the laundry room, thinking I could busy myself with the odd job here and there for distraction. As I neared the room my stomach lurched, and I knew he was near. I could sense it in our connection. Looking up I spotted him across the corridor leaving the control room. He stopped too then, daring a glance in my direction, however I carried on walking and turned my head away. I knew I couldn't get anymore attached than I already had, he just wasn't the person I thought he could be. Despite these thoughts I still yearned for him, but maybe I could move on. In the laundry room I was ironing and folding many uniforms whilst the dirty ones were being washed, it was tedious but still a distraction, and that's just what I needed at the moment. The laundry door opened and the suddenness of it jolted me from my thoughts, and caused me to drop the iron my hands and burn the skin on my arm. I yelped in pain as I immediately grabbed it, it stung so much. Looking up I saw Kylo rush over to me. Of course, he had caused me to drop the iron. He grabbed my arm and I tried to shake him off, not wanting his help, but he persisted on. Revealing the angry  burn across my arm I realised, it was bad, but he ignored that and raised his hand above it, face contorting as he concentrated hard. His eyebrows furrowed and his forehead gleaned with a slight sheen of sweat, I immediately realised my staring and decided to look at my arm instead, trying to block out any feelings. Suddenly the burn faded, and then disappeared completely. I gasped as he fell back, worn out from focusing so hard, and ran my fingers over where the burn had been. He'd gotten rid of it. He sighed
"We need to talk"
Still shocked from the missing burn I glanced up in a daze.
"Hmm?"
He held my eyes
"Look, I know I'm not a good person, and I know I was mean last night, that I hurt you, but you have to realise I don't want to hurt you. If anything I just want to look after you, but that's the problem. I shouldn't want to look after you...I'm a Sith Lord, It makes me weak. It feels like such a big conflict I'm trying I really am, I just don't know what do with these feelings"
I saw the sorrow deep in his eyes, and heard the truth in his words. I knew it was a lot for him to go through,  but I couldn't be involved with that
"You want to look after me and you shouldn't...how do I deal with that? You're in between the two, and it causes a horrible outcome..but now I can understand better that it isn't your fault, but please remember it is a lot for me to understand. I can see your conflict Kylo. This is up to you now, either you look after me or you don't, I won't take an inbetween"
I said it a little harshly, but he had to hear it
"I don't want there to be an inbetween either! I just want to look after you but I'm not a good person, I can't guarantee anything..I'm unpredictable"
I sighed
"You are a good person"
"No, you make me a good person"
I shook my head
"You've always been a good person, maybe it's just taken me for you to realise that. I've not invented the goodness in you, I've brought it out. But you keep fighting it, holding it back"
He seemed to contemplate something
"Only light side users can heal"
What? What does that mean...wait..he healed me, he just healed my burn but he's..
"Then you must have the light in you...surely?"
I debated as he whispered
"Now can you see my conflict?"
Yes, I understood. He must be so lost. He needs guidance, and maybe I could do that.
"Do you want my help"
A tear rolled down his cheek, taking me by surprise
"Please"
I englufed him in an embrace, the feeling of relief washing over the both of us. He shook a little, his emotions finally breaking loose. He needed this. I pulled back and wiped at his tears, standing on my tiptoes and kissing his forehead lightly. He suddenly held my face, and stared into my eyes deeply, his dark orbs glistening as he confessed
"I love you"