It has been a good year. Um, Nash has been wanting me back until one day he stop trying and talking to me. Kendall she is great! She is now like my sister, and I am so proud of her, I live in Los Angeles in the hills by myself. I have been modeling lately and it is fun and then I have met someone, but it's not official. And Cameron....... I haven't talked to him. In some photos it seems like he is having the time of his life. I am happy for him. it might be weird that i still love cameron, but why wouldn't i, he is my first love. but i know what your thinking, "why riley? he hurt you thats a horrible idea" well yes i agree with you but, our relationship as friends hasn't changed and i am glad it hasn't.
i walked to target and took photos with fans then went and found what i needed and went home.
when i got home my phone began to ring and i saw the ID caller to be cameron.
my heart plunge out go my chest. i paced back and forth and answered.
i put my hair behind my ear and said "hello?"
"hi riley"
"um hi cameron"
"how are you?"
"good, better you?"
"good..... i miss you"
what the hell?
"do you really? cause if you missed me you would've texted me "hey" or something. you would've checked on me. you would've done something to actually show me you cared about our friendship. and i know i told you to back away, but it hurts you could've fought. and why all of a sudden do you miss me now? why didn't you miss me when you cheated on me? or why if you miss why didn't you try to fix us, and why now that i moved on? why"
"Moved on?"
"Yes Cameron sadly moved on" "tell me riley, am i a bad person for whining you the best but still hoping you would be sad without me?"
"oh cameron, how sad have i been, i hated the fact that i was without you, sometimes i get so sad. so sad that i completely shut down. i stare blankly at the wall and it doesn't matter what you say to me. because in this moment and that moment when you hurt me, i just don't exist"
"i get it riley! i hurt you and i am sorry please, i can't get you off my mind, i cry every second thinking about you and what i did."
"No, no you don't get it. loving someone that doesn't love you back is one thing. loving someone who you think loves you back, then finding out they never did is a completely different thing. it crushes you cameron. you think everything is great, and your so happy with that someone, then everything is ripped right out from underneath you. it hurts like hell, and you will never and i mean never! get it until you experience it"
"what do you mean riley!!!"
"i would've never hurt you like that cameron never. a man should never look at another woman the way you look at your wife or girlfriend, never"
"i am sorry riley"
"please stop with your sorry's , i am done cameron so done, i can't believe i fell in love with you, i can believe i thought we would have a future together, i-i am so done, please tell me cameron are you worth my friendship or not"
"is"
"then show me then cameron, show me you are willing to fix our friendship"
"i love you riley, thank you"
"bye cameron"
hey guys i know, short and boring, i just have been really busy with school and everything. i am also losing this book, i don't know what to do anymore. i am making a new cameron dallas book, and i have one about brooklyn beckham which i ask you guys to read all the time. so idk what to do anymore next update later tomorrow. - jazz
