One direction:- Niall Eating disorder fanfiction

Fixation

Niall was so fixated on loosing weight and trying to be perfect that he didn't realize the life long affects that this so called diet was causing to his body, Niall had long since spiralled out of control, blinded by the prospect of perfection that he no longer noticed the dangers of what he was doing to himself, Niall's only focus was loosing weight and he would do anything in order to do so, successfully distancing himself from everyone who cared Niall continued spiralling out of control, pushing everyone away in the process.

Niall knew today was going to be difficult the moment he put his feet on the floor, his head ached and he felt like his entire body was in a constant spin, dragging himself to the bathroom mirror he starred at the pale blonde, his hair was lying limp on the top of his head, skin pale and cheeks sunken but that wasn't what Niall was concentrating on, Niall eyes were scanning himself for any flaws that needed perfected, eyes landing on the fat on his thighs and stomach he let out a frustrated sigh, because no matter how hard he was trying nothing seemed to change, he was still FAT.

The boys were sat at the table, Niall having long since left to the gym, "Where's Nialler this morning?" Louis asked as he reached for a piece of toast, "Gym" Liam responded being the only one aware of Niall's daily gym sessions, Louis let out a small laugh "Niall at the gym! I'd love to see that" Louis quipped as he bit in to his toast, Liam shook his head "No he goes every day, seems to be taking it seriously" he muttered as he placed his breakfast on the table, Louis shrugged slightly "Still, would love to see it" he laughed, Zayn frowned "Everyday?" he questioned, Liam nodded "Every morning, I woke up yesterday just before he went, ended up going with him" he said recalling the events of the previous morning, "You not with him today then?" Harry asked while taking a small drink, Liam shook his head "Couldn't keep up with him, he was at it for hours" he stated while giving a quick glance to the clock because How long does Niall need to work out for? Harry frowned "What's with his sudden interest in the gym?" he asked confused because since when did Niall go to the gym? Liam shrugged "Didn't say, just said he went every day and that was it" he concluded.

Niall made his way through the door whole body weak with the lack of food and tiered from the extent of his workout he dropped his bag and made his way to the lounge, Niall jumped in surprise when he noticed all the boys crowded around the couch while Liam was pacing the length of the carpet, "Erhm.." he coughed awkwardly as he made his way in, the boys whipped their heads around at the familiar accent "Where the hell have you been!?" Liam yelled angrily, "We called you like a hundred times, why didn't you pick up!?" Harry asked, Niall starred "What's it matter, I was at the gym I told you" he muttered, "What's it matter!" Louis said incredulously "Nobody knew where you were!" he yelled, Niall starred "Sorry, I didn't check.." he replied guiltily, "Course you didn't because that would be the responsible thing to do!" Louis scoffed before falling back on to the couch, "You're back now that's all that matters" Zayn said starring pointedly at Louis who just rolled his eyes, Harry starred "So you were at the gym?" he asked, Niall nodded from his standing position, leaning heavily against the wall, "..the entire time?" Harry questioned frowning because why would he be at the gym half the day? Niall nodded "Yeah" he replied seemingly oblivious to how long that was, the boys shared a concerned glance "Niall, you don't think that you're maybe overdoing it?" Liam questioned concern evident, Niall frowned "No" he replied shortly,"You never used to drag your pathetic fatass off to the gym every morning, why now?" Louis asked clearly still angry with Niall, Niall starred not quite comprehending what Louis had said, mind only focused on the word fatass, Niall shifted uncomfortably "I just do.." he muttered weakly before making his way back to his room.

Liam starred "Do you have to wind him up all the time Louis?" he said as he collapsed back down to the couch, Louis shrugged "I didn't, I just asked" he said defensively, "Well you didn't have to get so mad at him when he came back, did you?" Zayn said raising his eye brows at Louis who just made a disgruntled noise before turning away, Harry frowned slightly because why did Niall look so upset when he left? Harry turned to the other three muttering a quiet "I'm gonna check on Niall" before he made his way to Niall's room.

Niall made his way back to his room before angrily throwing his gym bag at the wall and collapsing to his bed, No matter how many times he went to the gym or how many meals he skipped nothing seemed to work, Niall was pulled from his thoughts when a knock sounded on the door, Niall bit off the urge to tell who ever it was to leave him the fuck alone and instead called out a quiet "come in" before sitting up on the bed to appear some what interested in whatever it was they wanted, Harry peeped his head around the door "can I talk to you for a second" he asked already making his way over beside to sit beside Niall, "sure, what is it?" Niall muttered as he moved his things of the bed for Harry to sit down, "Its you" Harry started "Is everything ok?" he asked carefully, Niall nodded "Im fine, im always fine!" he stated adding a fake smile as if to add to the effect, Harry starred "you looked upset when you left" Harry added not convinced by Niall's words, Niall starred "I said I'm fine, what do you want me to say!" he snapped, Harry starred seemingly not bothered by Niall's out burst "the truth" he replied shortly, Niall looked away "I'm fine" he mumbled quietly, "You can talk to me if something's bothering you" Harry said softly, "I cant" Niall muttered, Harry frowned "What do you mean you cant?" Harry asked worriedly, Niall looked down "It doesn't matter", Harry starred "If you ever want to talk...I'm always here" Harry said with a look of defeat, Niall nodded "I know" he replied, Harry starred before giving Nialls shoulder a tight squeeze "I'm serious Ni" he added before getting up and making his way out of the room, leaving Niall to sit and think over how much of a pathetic fatass he was, Louis' words not his.

Dinner surprisingly didn't go well either, the boys were digging in to a pizza while Niall sat quietly at the edge of his seat hoping the floor would swallow him up, the boys were currently having a pointless conversation about some irrelevant movie while Niall sat and had a starring contest with the food on his plate,mentally adding up the calories, All of a sudden he felt a pair of eyes on him, shifting uncomfortably under the gaze he looked up to find zayn starring at him, "Can I help you?" He asked harshly, Zayn starred at Niall before gesturing to his pizza "You not going to eat?" He asked, Niall starred "I'm not hungry, ate a lot before I left" he lied, Zayn raised his eyebrows slightly "Really?" He asked, Niall starred "Yeah" he replied shortly, Zayn just starred "Eat a bit, you were at the gym for hours, you must be hungry!" Zayn stated, Niall shook his head "Well I'm not" he muttered, "Niall pass me the cup" Louis asked argument seemingly forgotten, Niall starred "I thought I was just a pathetic fatass" he said hastily, Louis starred eyes wide and cartoon like while Zayn starred eyes darting between the two, "Niall..." Louis started, Niall cut him off "I don't give a shit!" He snarled, the table had long since fallen in to an awkward silence, "Niall I didn't-" Louis began, Niall shot to his feet, obviously bad idea due to the fact an all to familiar dizzy spell swept over him causing him to sway slightly, Zayn being closet managed to steady the blonde "Niall are you alright?" Zayn asked, voice laced with concern, Niall simply shrugged him off "I'm fine" he muttered, "Niall I didn't mean what I said..." Louis started only silencing when Liam sent him a glare basically telling him to shut up.

Niall was sat at his bed that night when he heard someone knock on the door, "Come in" he muttered, Louis carefully made his way in before taking a seat beside Niall, "I'm sorry" Louis started "I didn't mean it" he stated, Niall shrugged "Its fine I overreacted" he muttered, Louis frowned "No Niall it's not fine I shouldn't of said it, I'm sorry" he said pulling Niall in to a hug, Niall tensed uncomfortably, Louis frowned as he wrapped his arms around the blonde noticing how truly thin Niall had gotten, "...You've lost some weight" he remarked worriedly as he pulled away "You been eating enough?" He asked voice laced with concern, Niall laughed slightly, Louis frowned he really hadn't meant that as a joke.

I'm sorry I took forever to write this it's just I couldn't seem to get it right! I know it ended up pretty shit but I hope it was worth half the year you waited haha,Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed it! The next part will be better and sooner, I promise :)

XO