Step 10: Amaze Yourself

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"Photography?" Jack asked, rubbing his eyes and yawning.

"Yeah, but it would just be us, not like an actual lesson or anything." Mark stopped bouncing on the bed and looked down at Jack.

"Well, I guess so. I mean where are we going for it?" Jack sat up, leaning back against the pillows.

"I thought we could go back to the fair, go on some more rides?" 

"I don't know... I mean I don't want to get there and ruin your experience." Jack looked over at the clock, feeling like he had been woken up in the middle of the night, although it was only 9 in the morning.

"There shouldn't that many people there. And you won't ruin it. Don't worry, if you need to leave then just tell me." Mark pulled Jack up to stand with him.

One thing that Jack was happy about was the fact that he didn't need to try and hide his scars from Mark anymore. Sure, he wished Mark had never saw them, but he was bound to find out at some point or another. Even if Mark knew, the rest of the world didn't, so he still wore long sleeves out in public. 

"Ready?" Mark called down from up stairs, where he was getting ready. Jack nodded to himself, grabbing the camera that Mark bought for him a while ago. He tucked it in his bag, and grabbed his zip up hoodie, already having his beanie on, and walked up the stairs. 

"We are going to get breakfast first, too. We'll just go right in town." Mark took the stairs down two at a time, smiling at Jack, who was tying his converse. He stood up, putting on his sweatshirt and sighed. "Let's go." 

Jack played music, rolling down the window a little bit. The air and sun was hot, but a cool breeze made it not die-from-dehydration-as-soon-as-you-walk-outside hot. Jack stuck his hand out the window, thinking.

He used to want to kill himself, and he used to remind himself of that practically every five minutes. Now, it was more of a once in a while kind of thing. Something would happen, and he would feel useless, stupid, ugly, fat, pathetic. You name it. 

Jack had Mark to help him keep flying, and even thought Jack hated the idea of needing someone, he loved it at the same time. He told Mark everything now. Even things that Jack was scared to tell himself, he would tell Mark. Mark knew what to do, and that was to not tell everyone. Mark would listen to Jack, and talk to him about his feelings.

Mark didn't call Jack insane like his mom did. He didn't call him names and make him feel worse about himself. Mark didn't send Jack away without a goodbye. He didn't send him away without saying 'I love you', or 'I'll see you in a couple months'. No, Mark did what any person should have done, and talked about things.

"Hello? Jack?" Mark leaned forward, and got Jack's attention, who was leaning against the slightly open window looking out the windshield. 

"What? Oh, right." Jack noticed they were sitting in front of the small cafe they went to often. 

"I assume you want pancakes?" The nice lady who was here most of the time asked, smiling. Jack nodded. He loved pancakes. Jack probably loved pancakes as much as Mark loved that stupid fair, which was a lot.

"Well, what have you been thinking about? You've seemed really quiet this morning." Mark took a bite of food, looking up at Jack.

"Just, stuff. I guess I shouldn't be thinking about it because it's in the past. And like you said, if it's in the past, and bad, then it shouldn't matter." Jack took a bite if his pancake, looking out the window.

"Do you wanna talk about it?"

"Not really."

"Alright."

The two boys walked out after paying, getting in the car. Mark fluffed his hair in the mirror before putting his seat belt on, making Jack giggle.

"What?" Mark looked at Jack, making his face all scrunched up. He loved hearing Jack laugh. It was like when the a song from a Disney movie that called all the birds in. Althoug Jack didn't laugh nearly as much as a Disney princess sang.

Jack shook his head, pulling the camera out of his bag, taking a picture of Mark as he concentrated on the road, listening to the music that was playing.

Jack noticed that he would do that a lot. Jack would play music and Mark would pay really close attention to the stories that the lyrics told. Jack was the kind of person that would listen to music that he could relate to, so Mark could tell how Jack was feeling depending on the song.

Jack looked at the picture, smiling. He was so lucky, even to just have Mark in his life. As bad as it sounded, Jack was happy his mom sent him away. Otherwise he might have never met his boyfriend.

---

"Now!" Mark said as he let the red balloons go, watching as they drifted into the air. Jack took multiple pictures, not wanting to mess it up. A little girl nearby pointed up at the balloons, asking her mother why they let them go. The mother, looked at the two boys, and told her to ask them.

"Why did you let your balloons go?" The little girl asked, making Jack freeze up. He never really liked kids. Jack never really knew how to deal with something so small that could have such a large effect on the future of the world.

"Because we wanted to take a picture of them. Do you want to see it?" The little girl nodded, standing on her tippy-toes to look at the camera screen as Jack lowered it, trying not to drop it from holding it at a certain angle.

"Can you take my picture?" She smiled up at Jack, who instantly looked over to Mark.

"I, uh, don't know. Would you like me to take your picture?" He asked after Mark glanced over at the girl's mother, who nodded her head. Clearly she could hear everything, being she was just across the paved path.

"Can I play paddy cake with Blue?" She pointed at Mark, calling him by his hair color.

"As I take the picture?" Jack asked, feeling nervous about talking to a little girl. Pathetic, right?

The little girl nodded, and giggled as she stepped in front of Mark, who got on his knees and started playing paddy cake, just like she wanted. She began saying the chant, and Jack looked over at her mother, who was smiling as she held her phone up; either taking pictures of the scene or recording it.

Jack walked to get a side view of the two, sitting, crossing his legs in the middle of the path. A group of three people walked in between the camera, saying sorry as they quickened their pace. Jack snapped a picture.

The legs where going across the whole frame, blurry, but focused and on the other side, was Mark and the little girl smiling at each other, playing paddy cake.

Jack felt a hand on his shoulder, jumping and looking up at the girls mother. "Thank you, she just loves being the center of attention." 

Jack stood up, shrugging his shoulders. "It's nothing. Really. I just came here to hang out with Mark, or Blue I guess, and take pictures." He smiled, seeing Mark stand up and walk over to the two people talking, making sure the little girl didn't wander off.

"Blue is funny." She told her mother as the two walked away, waving goodbye to the two strangers with crazy hair.

"Her mom said thanks, for letting her be the center of attention."

"It was fun." Mark slung his arm around Jack, the two boys walking to get cotton candy. "Green." He added on, quietly, only to have Jack call him Blue.

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