Chapter 18: Faking and Racing

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Sang

I glide to the wall, touching it to signal that I've finished my eight lap of freestyle. Since this is such a short warmup, I decided to push myself harder than I normally would, swimming the first four laps normally and then sprinting the second four laps as fast as I could. I'm barely out of breath, but in the lane next to mine Luke stops at the wall and breathes heavily.

In fact, all of the boys finish at almost the exact same time as me, and all of them are looking extremely tired and worn out. "Do you guys normally go that fast?" I ask them doubtfully.

"You bet Cupcake, we definitely go that fast!" Luke gasps besides me. I look at him critically, and his face turns red before he looks around and addresses a question to Kota that was apparently so urgent he couldn't finish his conversation with me. Suspicion grows inside of me, and if I didn't know any better I'd say that the boys purposely finished at the same time as me. I'll have to put my theory to the test during the next part of the warmup.

Smiling a bit deviously, I signal to Kota that I'm ready and we all push off of the wall to begin butterfly. For the first six laps of the IM set, I sprint harder than I've ever sprinted before. I imagine that I'm in the Olympics and the whole country is watching me with awe, hoping for me to succeed. My imagined applause push me to pull harder, and to not give in to the burning in my lungs. During the last two laps, I slow down to a glacial pace. A sneaky glance in both directions reveals that sure enough, the boys are still matching my speed. My face flushes with anger as I realize that they are babying me and keeping themselves to my speed to not make me feel bad about being the slowest.

Once more, we all reach the wall at the same time. If I thought that the boys were out of breath before, it is nothing compared to now. All of them are panting, and Gabriel and Victor go a step farther and actually get out of the pool to collapse on to the pool deck. They're putting on a show to make me feel faster! There's no way that my speed would actually pose a problem for them since they're all bigger and more muscular, so it all must be fake. I thought these boys were honest, but apparently not. I shake my head and disappointment as I get out of the pool to talk with Mr. Blackbourne and Sean.

"Sang, where are you going?" Nathan calls out to me in between breaths. I ignore him and continue walking towards the two coaches, who are now watching me intently.

"Sang?"

"Cupcake?"

"Princess, what's the matter?"

I tune out their calls as I begin explaining my problem to Mr. Blackbourne and Sean. Mr. Blackbourne doesn't look as angry as I thought he would and instead wears a millimeter smile, but he agrees to my plan without hesitation.

"Sean, you'll be the official timer. I'll supervise the waiting area to make sure that nothing gets out of hand." he says. He gives me a wink, turns to face the pool, and suddenly roars "Everyone, out of the pool NOW!"

Startled, all of the boys leap out of the pool and stand in a line before Mr. Blackbourne, Sean, and me. They all look curious, but hold in their questions. Mr. Blackbourne's face is stern enough to scare me even though I'm not in trouble, so I can't imagine how the boys feel.

"It has come to my attention that certain members on this team are faking their laps for their own goals. This is not how a team works, and will only hurt us, so from now on I will be deciding the lane assignments. In order to make an informed decision, everyone will swim a 200 IM for time. Anyone who does not put their all into this sprint will get hours." he says.

Hours? Hours of what? I put my questions aside as he continues his instructions. "Everyone will wait for their turn to swim outside the pool area so that the times are kept secret. After finishing swimming, return back to the group. Sean will be the timer and I'll supervise to make sure the rules aren't broken." Mr. Blackbourne's eyes glint with steel when he says this, and I see several of the boys gulp nervously. "The order is as follows: Mr. Lee, Mr. Griffin, Mr. Korba, the elder Mr. Taylor, the younger Mr. Taylor, Mr. Morgan, and finally Ms. Sorenson."

The seven of us not currently swimming follow Mr. Blackbourne out of the pool area while Kota stays back with Sean. I can tell that the boys all want to question this unexpected turn of events, but under Mr. Blackbourne's watchful eye they remain quiet. I was worried that the boys would blame me since the order came right after I finished talking with Mr. Blackbourne and Sean, but either they haven't made the connection yet or they don't care. I figure it's the first option.

With the exception of Mr. Blackbourne, we all sit in a loose circle. I rest my head in my hands and fight the urge to cry when I think of how naïve I was in trusting the boys. Of course they couldn't see me as a real competitor and potential teammate, but instead as some girl who needs to be babied. Never mind the fact that I'm the top soloist in the country, no they just had to put their awful acting skills to use and purposely match my speed to make me feel faster. How patronizing!

My mental ranting dispels any urge to cry and I'm in control of my emotions by the time that Kota comes back. Nathan gets up without a word and heads off with serious expression. One by one, the boys leave and come back looking confident in their times. Finally, Victor approaches the group and I get up to swim. Each boy silently wishes me good luck, and their expressions look so sincere that I find myself doubting my earlier thoughts. Maybe we are all the same speed? No, that is too unlikely. When the pool comes into sight I force myself to focus so that I can swim my best. I don't want to risk getting hours, whatever they are.

"Hey Sang, ready to swim?" Sean asks with a good-natured smile. I don't smile back- I'm in competitor mode now. Instead, I give a simple nod. Sean counts down, and on "go" I dive into the crisp water. Adrenaline boosts my strength, and in what feels like seconds I'm finishing the freestyle lap. As soon as I touch the wall I immediately tear off my swim cap and push off the wall again to swim a cool down lap. By the time I'm back Sean has the times listed in order and texts Mr. Blackbourne to bring the boys back.

Once everyone is gathered around him, Sean starts reading the results. "Okay, so from slowest to fastest, we have:

Gabriel: 2 minutes 54 seconds

Silas: 2 minutes 52 seconds

Victor: 2 minutes 48 seconds

North: 2 minutes 43 seconds

Luke: 2 minutes 37 seconds

Kota: 2 minutes 35 seconds."

Here Sean pauses for dramatic effect, but I'm so stunned that he hasn't called my name yet that I don't really notice. I guess that the boys weren't faking being out of breath after all!

"Just say it already!" Nathan yells at him. Mr. Blackbourne shoots Nathan an angry look, but Nathan is too busy staring down Sean to notice.

"In second place comes Nathan at 2 minutes and 32 seconds, which means that first place goes to Sang with 2 minutes and 29 seconds!" Sean finishes. Cheers rise up around me and all the boys congratulate me for my fast time. Their applause don't penetrate the fog surrounding my thoughts, however, because all I can think about is how I falsely believed the boys had broken my trust. I want to cry, but Avidite's voice pops into my head reminding me of the first rule of synchro:

No crying at swim practice.

So instead, I hold all my emotions in and finish the practice in silence.

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