The Beauty in Pain | Book One of In Pain Trilogy *EDITING*

6. Argue

Questions rushed her mind all at once but Mynera couldn't focus on any of it. There were too many, they were too fast. Some loud and demanding, others low, a whisper that seemed to already know the answer even when the question was asked. There was so much going on in her head right then and there that she would have surely stayed in the water until she shriveled up like a prune if the handmaids hadn't come for her.

"M'lady?" one called and she flinched at the interruption.

"Y-yes?" she answered, her voice croaky from disuse.

"Are you almost done, m'lady? You've been in the water for a while now."

"O-oh, have I?" She laughed nervously. "I'm sorry. I'll be back in a second. You two do not need to worry. You can go back now."

Mynera crawled out of the river as their footsteps went away. The night air was now too cold and she rushed to put on her scents and pull the flowing nightdress up her hips and over her shoulders.

Saenar has a lover.

It was still unbelievable. So unbelievable that she laughed, but to her ears it sounded like a bark.

My future husband has a lover.

She shouldn't be so surprised. Plenty of married men had whores. It was a common practice. That he had one before the marriage even begun was a bit of a shock but so what? He was eighteen. He had needs. All men do. They didn't know how to control themselves , so blaming Saenar for having a lover wasn't really the solution.

Besides, she knew he hated her. She could see it in his eyes every time he looked at her, could hear it in his voice every time he spoke. She didn't know why and frankly she didn't care much. But now she knew. He hated her because she was his soon to be wife and not his precious Charmaline. 

Well, it didn't matter if he hated her. She hadn't done anything wrong. She had been forced into this just as much as he was. So what if she didn't have anyone she loved? That person might be out there and he was standing in the way of that. Wives with lovers wasn't a much practiced occurence and it would be much worse when she was queen. No, she may never find the one she was destined for. All because she had to marry her beloved betrothed.

Charmaline and Saenar could go screw each other for all she cared. They were meant for each other. The girl who wanted to marry the prince and the prince who wanted to marry her. She could just step out of the picture and let them have their happily ever after.

The hell she will.

Why was she so angry anyway? Why did she cared what he did? He's nothing to me, she reminded herself. Merely a partner in a wedding transaction, that was all. That was all she needed from him. His name, a ring and his seed. Nothing else mattered because nothing else should.

So why was she digging her toes into the ground like a bird?

"Oh, damn him," she muttered, coming to her senses. She should march right into camp and congratulate him. That way she knew she didn't care.

Mynera headed back, her used clothes clutched in her hands. The handmaids were waiting for her at the camp and as soon as they spotted her, they ran to take the clothes. She thanked them with a smile but it felt false against her teeth.

She needed sleep. Yes, that was it. She was tired and so she was feeling things she wouldn't normally feel. Her mind and body was too tired to put up a defense; she was sure of it.

Sighing softly to herself, Mynera walked to her tent. There was silence in the camp now, almost everyone sleeping. She paused when she came to the prince's tent but then forced herself to continue, not trusting what she might do if she lingered any longer.