Reckless

Expect

(Jana refuses to let someone else have a chapter >.> The song was chosen by his voice. (that makes me sound crazier) Not to be mean, but to make a point it tries to hint at in the chapter, though, not sure why it's trying to make it here.)

Jana-

The ride away from the jail was one of the most nerve-wracking experiences of Jana's life. He wasn't afraid of Orion's driving, or really, Orion, but he chose to sit in the very back trunk area of the SUV he said he'd borrowed from his friend, Xena, anyways. Seeing the building disappear was the first thing that had him fidgeting.

That's my home. That's where I belong. He thought to himself, repeating the words over and over.

His new voice tried to calm him several times, but retreated after it seemed to only make his thoughts more frantic. He sat in the back with his soaked, untied shoes as disturbing visions played behind his eyes. At one point he briefly heard mumbling, but wasn't paying enough attention to his present situation to understand who was talking or about what.

It wasn't until the car came to a complete stop, then moved a few more feet to part, that Jana lifted his head slightly. It hadn't nearly been as long as Orion had said it would take to get back to his club... Why are we stopping?

The answer to his unasked question appeared when Orion opened one of the side doors and reached over the back seat, offering him something he couldn't quite see in the dim light given off by the car's one working overhead light. Since Orion wasn't being aggressive and hadn't surprised him, Jana awkwardly reached forward and took the offered item, then brought it close to his nose.

It smells like sugar. He thought right as the chilliness of the treat permeated the cone that he was holding. His new voice was back immediately, yelling in his mind that he needed to consume the ice cream as quickly as possible.

He had always liked vanilla ice cream, but his new voice seemed a little too excited. He almost thought about giving it to Tera, just to see how the voice would react, but as his belly rumbled, eager for the treat, he figured that it was better to just eat it himself. He also wasn't sure how Tera would handle the ingredients, either.

As he began to eat slowly, the car started and Orion got them back on the road. Jana only took a few licks before his attention seemed to divert to his thoughts. The ice cream had brought back something he hadn't remembered in a very, very long time. It was a memory from when he was young, of his father buying him an ice cream cone with sprinkles and weird sugar eyes. Before his life had changed forever. Before everything he had taken for granted was stolen away.

I don't want to remember him. Not like that.

His new voice surprised him by replying with something he didn't think he'd hear from it, considering it said that it would help him, not work against him.

That's papa, too.

"No it's not! How dare you even say that!" Jana shouted as he whirled around, crushing the dripping ice cream cone in his hand as he aimed his fist at the tinted side window that had been behind him.

Don't! The new voice shouted, forcing Jana's left hand to snag his right wrist a second before the glass could be shattered. Fury burned beneath his skin as he felt the voice try to keep him from breaking the window.

"Go to hell! Go fuck that bastard you think was so fucking great! See how good it feels!"

Jana, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it that way. The voice hurried to reply, but it didn't seem to get through to Jana at all as he ground his teeth together and slammed his forehead into the side of the car to try and make the voice shut up.