Chapter Twenty

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Rishabh's pov

I wish it was humanly possible to rewind time and fix the mistakes you did because as I watched Radhika walk away I really wanted to do that. I wish I could take back my words and tell her that I didn't mean any of it but it was too left. I didn't let her explain, how do I expect her to let me explain.

Watching her with someone else just flipped something inside me and before I knew words were coming out of my mouth. It was like my defence mechanism. I wanted to hide my feelings so badly that I ended up hurting her. She was so close to him and it made me so uneasy. I'm not even sure what happened back there because in my crazy state, I didn't even bother to ask.

She slapped me so hard, I can still feel the sensations but I know I deserve it. God! I deserve so much more than just a slap for what I've done. I said things that can never be taken back. I accused her of something so terrible, I feel ashamed.

I regret saying those things without context. I couldn't even trust her a little to know that this isn't like her. I judged her character like some asshole and it made me more furious.

I stood in front of her door thinking how should I fix the terrible mess I've created but nothing came into my mind. I wanted to apologise but I don't think this is right time or even a sorry could the damage I've purposely created.

I decided it is best to give her time or atleast give myself some time so I can think of a way I could possibly fix this without hurting her even more.

I was restless the entire time because all I wanted to do was apologize for what I said. In the morning after getting the first thing I did was walked up to her door and knocked it but no one answered. I checked my phone in the hope that maybe she might have informed me where she was but there was no message.

I didn't know where she went or maybe she had left but it made feel more worse than ever. I manage to form one meaningful relationship in years and I blew it up completely. She is most probably thinking of quiting and all of this because I can not keep myself from messing it up like all the other times.

I walked up to the reception to ask them to cancel my lunch reservation for the meeting as I was in no longer mood to talk business right now.

"I would like to cancel my lunch reservation under Rishabh Jaisingh" I informed the receptionist

"Sure sir"

I was leaving when she called me and handed me a file of work files that belonged to Radhika "A lady named Radhika dropped it for you in the morning while leaving"

"Did you know where was she headed to?" I asked hopefully

"All she said is she's going to visit her mom and doesn't want you to follow her. And then she left these files saying you might need them in her absence"

I just nodded and left. She left to visit her parents. She doesn't even like going there yet she wanted to escape me so badly that she went there. She must be disgusted by the sight of me.

I knew I screwed up big time but it didn't feel so real until now. I wish I could erase all of this and go back to being the it was but as amazing as it sounds it is impossible. I wanted to apologise so bad but I understood where she was coming from and right now the last thing she wants is me trying to explain myself.

It would be best for me to give her some time until she decides to talk to me or rather atleast see me. As much as this is going to kill me I think this is the time to be patient.

It's been three days since Radhika left and hasn't called me either. I'm trying to patient but it is hard when I miss her so much. I had no idea how much I started caring for her presence until she left. Everytime my phone would ring I would wish it were her but it wasn't.

As time was passing by, my restless was just increasing. I wanted to talk to her, ask for her forgiveness, tell her how horrible I feel but I couldn't. The project was almost over which meant we'll soon be leaving for Delhi and I wanted some miracle to happen so that everything gets sorted before returning. It was kind of a very difficult thing to ask for knowing how mad she was but I wanted to something, anything to make her atleast try to forgive me.  

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