"Can you feel the Silence?" A Matt Nicholls Love Story.

One: Meeting New Faces

I woke up with dull lights and white walls all around me. My breathing quickened at the deafening silence. I looked down and saw myself in a black sports bra and some spandex shorts. Little pink and red marks lingered all around my body. All the battle scratches and scars were from my own personal battles with the voices in my head. I sat up and saw where I was. "James DeVounti." I was in DeVounti.

DeVounti is one of the most intense insane asylums or more perferably called "mental health institution" in all of Dublin. Basically, from the stories I heard, if you wanted to die before you wound up in DeVounti. you would have wished you committed suicide when you had the chance. How'd I get here? I was just in London, England. How'd I get all the way to Dublin. I stood up and grabbed a pair of clothing that was sitting on the table. A black jumper with grey leggings. I put them on and looked at my reflection in the mirror. I looked like I was crazy. My once beautiful hair was sticking up in random places and and my eyes didn't shine. It showed who I really was. I was crazy. I was insane. I lifted up my arms to the lines to prove it. I was alone. Who knew where Jacklyne was. She probably escaped. If they grabbed her too. I'd never forgive myself. I was the main reason why we went out that day. I wanted a new camera. I loved photography. The house I shared with Jacklyne proved it. Photographs of everything, of anything were up on the wall. Photographs I had taken of Zebras during my stay in Africa a few summers ago, to the Statue of Liberty in America, to the beautiful Himalayas. Every photograph represented something to me. Photography was my passion but so was cutting. The only thing I had to live for was taking pictures and Jacklyne. Everything else, was shit. No job, no parents, had an ex boyfriend who enjoyed to rape me and call me a slut on a daily basis. He'd abuse me and once had all his friends gang bang me. I started to self harm and drink more and more. It also didn't help that I was born with bipolar disorder, anxiety, and severe depression.

I heard a tap on the door and then a boy my age opened the door.

"Woah.. Sorry I thought Dr. Jones said to stop by here... And make sure that... You were ok. Because youve been basically um..." He cleared his throat and looked at the ground.

"In a coma?"

"More like unconscious."

"How long was I out?"

"A week."

I nodded and my eyes filled with sadness. "Tell the bitch I'm awake."

He nodded. "I-ok bye Raven."

"How do you know my name?"

"You're friend Jacklyne told me."

Shit so they did snag her too. Shit who was going to pay for the house bills? Who was going to feed Steve? Who was going to sell our house? Oh god is my room clean? Is everything all right. I dropped to the ground and started to scream. I was beginning to have an anxiety attack. The boy switched from being a shy little bitch to comforting man. "Shh, Raven.. Everything will be alright." He started to sing me a song I didn't recognize and rubbing circles into my side. I felt myself calm down. I broke down crying into his chest as he continued. He held me in his arms and sang some more. I continued to cry but I felt much calmer. "Thank you Alan, I can take it from here." A rough voice said. I looked up from behind my hair as "Alan" loosened his grip on me. "Alright Doctor." He began to walk out of the room.

I then was there with Doctor Jones. "I'm sure you know why you're here." "Because I'm crazy."

He smiled a fake sympathetic smile and took notes.

"You were sent with another girl from a coffee shop. A stranger informed seeing cuts on the other girls arms and called DeVounti. Then I guess the clerk saw yours as you were getting your coffee. We are here to help you though Raven."