twelve // inner thoughts

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Everything that's happened in the last few days has gotten me into quite a bit of trouble at school. Not only have I not been doing my work, causing me to fall behind in my classes, but the principal called me into the office during my free period.

Needless to say, I'm pissed. And judging by the look on his face, so is he.

"Kacey, I know you've only been here for a few weeks, but in order to leave school early, you have to have a note from your father. You can't just walk out whenever you don't feel like being here," he said to me.

"Yeah, I'm aware of that. I'm not dumb."

"Well, would you care to explain why you deemed it fit to leave during homeroom every day this week? Knowing full well that you haven't had a note any of the days?"

"Some stuff came up that I had to deal with. What's the big deal?" I shrugged.

"Miss. Roberts, I will not tolerate this attitude. Detention after school today. No exceptions. If you miss it, you will be suspended. Understood?" He hands me my slip, and I storm out of his office.

"What'd you do, K?" Bubba asked. We have free period together, so when he heard them call me down, he must've followed and waited for me.

"Thanks to you and the guys, I have detention today for skipping this week. This is fucking unbelievable."

The bell rang, and soon enough me and the guys were off to lunch. Bubba filled them in on what happened and they all just laughed.

"Come Kacey, you can't blame us for what goes down," William said, throwing his arm over my shoulders.

"Why can't I? If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't be in this situation," I replied, throwing him a look.

"Hey, you made the choice to come with us. You didn't have to, considering you only had one day of training," Chase said.

"One of those days was for my training, Chase."

"Okay, we'll take the blame for that one. But Wednesday wasn't our fault. If you weren't ready, you could've just told us no," Erik said.

"I wasn't in the group text yet, so how was I supposed to know what was going to happen? And you practically pulled me out of my chair in class and dragged me with you," I replied.

"She's right guys. It's not her fault. We've done a shitty job at keeping her up to date with what goes on. We've done this by ourselves for so long, that we aren't used to having someone else around us. Sorry, K," Ryan said, giving me a small smile before putting his head back down.

Things have felt different between me and Ryan since the other night on the back deck. I don't know what it is, but it's not a bad different. He's been strangely nice to me. Not that he isn't usually nice to me, but more nice than normal I should say.

Maybe he feels awkward about what happened. He shouldn't. He opened up to me about something he's never told anyone else. Maybe he's not used to feeling vulnerable around people and showing them that he can be.

I've been thinking about him a lot lately. I find him even more attractive than I did when I first saw him. And lately, I've been having these feelings like I might actually have feelings for him. Never in a million years would I ever have expected to say that, but it's true.

I don't really think I should be worrying about it though, because I know damn well that those feelings would never be reciprocated. He doesn't want me and I'm fine with that. It's not like I'm ever going to tell him how I feel anyways. It's probably better that way.

The guys are the first real friends I've ever had. Most of my life, I've been alone. My mom left when I was four, and my dad is never home. Even when he is, he doesn't pay any attention to me. At my old school, I was always alone. I walked down the hallway with my head down, headphones in. No one talked to me. I knew I wouldn't be there long, so I didn't bother trying to make any friends that I knew I would have to leave in a few months.

But things feel different here in High Point. When I graduate, I'll be eighteen. If dad has to move again for his job, I have the right to make my own choice to stay. And if that's what happens, that's what I'm going to do. For the first time in my life, I feel at home here.

"Kacey, you okay?" William asked.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I'm fine. Why?"

"You just zoned on us completely. Did you hear anything we said?"

"No, sorry. What were you saying?"

"Training again after last period. You in?" Bubba asked.

"Can't. Detention."

"So? Just skip."

"Oh yeah, because skipping the detention I got for skipping school is a great fucking idea, guys."

"We can fake a note from your dad saying there was an emergency and you have to leave. It'll be fine," Ryan says, looking up from the table.

"Alright, fine. I'm in."

Mafia // Ryan BlaneyWhere stories live. Discover now