Phobia: Edge Me

Tumors

I have a tumor growing inside me.

It is heavy . It is vicious.

The tumor gives me headaches, makes me feel dirty and unclean. And each day it grows larger and larger still, filling up the space of my conscience. Just like a parasite, it feeds off of my body. And like the host I am, there’s nothing that I can do except exist and let it take me into oblivion.

There are others who suffer like me. They too, have tumors that are caused from the constant stress and judgement. Nobody can treat us, all we can do is hold onto morals that we hold dear until it spreads even further and eats them all up too. It’s a never ending cycle of paranoia, of self consciousness. It matters what they think of me, so I need to change. But changing causes it to grow.

Is the pain really worth it?

Maybe.

A tug on my nose to make it stretch, a prodding on my lips to make them plumper, and a caress around my cheeks to erase all the creases. Although my body is young, this cancer makes me feel old the more it swells and spreads.