Today a Millionaire, Tomorrow a Maid {COMPLETED}

•thirty three•

song isnt really related to the chapter but it has been on repeat for weeks now and thought y'all should listen.. im in love it is hypnotizing.

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Noah's POV

It's been three weeks already, and nothing sucks more than missing her.

I groaned loudly and stopped jogging abruptly taking my earphones out; she was creeping her way into my mind again when the point of this jog was to get her out, to release my stress and to just forget for a short moment.

I sighed and looked up, my heart ached and my stomach dropped, I knew I jogged all the way here purposely but I haven't been here in a long while...

But I needed to talk to someone, and she was the only one I could be personal with, I know she'd never tell anyone about our conversation, that is because she can't, she's dead.

I pushed the rusty inky black metal gate open, I could smell the stench of moss forming at its edges.. nobody takes care of this place? It seems like it has been abandoned for years, it's like all the burials here didn't have families or friends

Why am I judging though.. it's my first visit in years, I felt selfish because I wasn't coming her to say a prayer, I was coming to vent out my problems

I walked inside and was already regretting it, I forgot where my own madre's grave was located.

I wandered around, passing by obelisk shaped tombs, various white-ish grey graves covered with withered wilted flowers left by their loved ones who knows how long ago, I kept reading the names of the burials, then my eyes landed on a hers "Valentina Marie Torres" and my mind flooded with memories and flashbacks from the times I came to her in my vulnerable state, how I let my heart out for her and for just a little moment forgot that I'm a feared mafia boss, I forgot that I was grown up and how I was so cold and heartless and just came to her as her little boy

Yes I only come to her when my heart is aching, or when I'm in deep crap and just need an escape from reality, it's been such a long time since my heart felt something deep, Adriana left a scar for sure.

I felt guilty for not getting her beautiful roses, I squatted down and wiped the dirt off her grave "hola mama,mi ángel" I whispered and smiled weakly

"I know you are most likely upset I have not visited you in so long mama but I have been busy.. I know you're probably shaking you head in disappointment but forgive me... I miss you with my all, hey remember when you used to practically beg me to settle down and to search for my soul mate, you always told me that she is out there, and you know what? I found her madre, I found her, but then I lost her because I'm a coward, I was afraid of my own feelings, I couldn't accept them, I didn't realize how true and real they are until I lost her, and now I might lose her forever, she might join you any second and that scares the living hell out of me mama, I don't want to lose her, she's on my mind all the time, wherever I go, whatever I do she's there, and I lost her, I thought maybe I'd move on because feelings weren't for men like me, but feelings are stronger than anything... I feel so weak and numb, I don't know how to save her, even though I was the one who wounded her" I let out a pained groan , I've never been more honest with my feelings than now...

I thought I love Adriana

But

I'm utterly in love with her

I won't let her go, she won't leave me, not like this... not now

I felt my phone vibrating and I took it out of case holder attached to my arm, and I almost fell back when I read the caller's ID, it's from the hospital