Remembering My First Real Kiss - PUBLISHED Under Pop Fiction

XX. The Last Tryst.

Kakatapos ko lang magbihis at mag ayos ng sarili nang ako ay huminga ng malalim. Mukhang napalakas ata dahil napalingon sa akin si Maggie. "You want to talk about it?" Napangiti ako at umiling.

Best friend ko nga talaga siya. Kahit hindi ko sabihin, naiintindihan niya sa galaw ko kung may iniisip akong problema o kung may dinadamdam ako. "Wala ito, Magggie. Kinakabahan lang ako dahil sa party." Which is half-true, kinakabahan talaga ako pero mas iniisip ko yung relasyon namin ni Mark at kung saan man kami dadalhin ng namamagitan sa amin.

"Lie to me all you want." She rolled her eyes. "Sa akin ka rin naman tatakbo kapag hindi mo na kayang kimkimin 'yan." She grinned.

"Ang sama talaga ng ugali mo." Pagbibiro ko sa kanya.

Sumeryoso naman ang hitsura niya. "But, seriously... You know I'm here, right?" I smiled and nodded at her.


Nagsimula na pala ang party sa function hall ng pagkadating namin. May mga intermission number pa yung ibang estudyante, even the professors! Walang keme silang kumanta, sumayaw, umarte at kung anu-ano pa. 


Ngunit na pigil ang kasiyahan ko---hindi ng lahat---dahil sa nakita ko. Nung binuksan kasi ang dance floor sa mga nais mag sayaw ay silang dalawa ang unang sumayaw duon. Mabuti na lang at madilim dahil hindi ko alam na tumutulo na pala ang mga luha ko sa pisngi ko. Kung hindi pa pinunasan ni Maggie yung pisngi ko, hindi ko pa malalaman.


"Your boyfriend is such a douchebag." She said through clenched teeth.

"H-he's not my boyfriend." I said while looking down at my feet.

"Not your boyfriend?!" She repeated. "Are you out of your mind?!" She shook my my shoulders. 

Napatingin ako sa paligid at nakita kong nakakakuha kami ng atensyon. "Maggie, pinagtitinginan na tayo ng mga tao."She closed her eyes then shook her head. "Let's go outside. And sasabihin mo na sa akin lahat ng nagpapabigat dyan sa kalooban mo." She grabbed my left arm and we went out of the function hall. 

"Sa cabin natin tayo mag-usap." I said after sniffing. "Baka kasi may makarinig sa atin." She only nodded and she kept her mouth shut.


Tahimik naming tinahak ang cabin namin. Pagkapasok na pagkapasok namin ay dumiretso ako sa kama at humiga. Biglang nagbalik sa isipan ko yung nakita ko sa function hall.



Si Mark at si Ms Val... Sweet na nagsasayaw, kung minsan pa ay hahalikan siya ni Ms Val sa labi...


Hindi ko maiwasang isipin na sana ako yung kasayaw niya... Na sana ako yung humahalik sa kanya ng walang alinlangan... Na sana pupwede kaming magsama at makita ng ibang tao...Na sana pwede kaming dalawa lang at magtatagal pa kami...


Tumabi sa akin si Maggie at may iniabot. "Magpunas ka nga ng luha! Buti na lang waterproof yung make-up natin."Umiiyak na naman pala ako.


Ano bang ginagawa mo sa akin, Mark? Bakit ba naging maiyakin ako nang dumating ka sa buhay ko?


"I'm sorry." I said while crying. "It's just that, ang sakit-sakit na. Hindi ko na rin kasi talaga kayang pigilan..." I said between sobs. "I've fallen hard... At baka hindi na ako makabangon kapag tinapos na niya ang lahat ng ito." I covered my face with my hands.

"Then why don't you stop it yourself? Baka di gaanong kasakit kapag ikaw ang tumapos." She suggested.

"I... can't." I sit up and looked at her. "I can't, Maggie. I love him too much! What you're asking is suicide!" I bawled."Para ko ng pinapatay yung sarili ko sa sakit kapag gagawin ko iyon!" She sat up too.

"Maybe that was a lame suggestion." She shrugged. "So what will you do know? Cry your eyes out while he's enjoying her company?" I heard a hint of challenge in her tone.

She took my hand with her both hands. "Kung mahal mo talaga siya, ipaglalaban mo siya. Hindi yung susuko ka agad-agad ng wala kang ginagawa para ikaw ang piliin niya!" I looked at our hands, contemplating what she'd said. 


Tama siya. Wala talagang mangyayari sa akin---amin kung hindi ko ipaglalaban ang nararamdaman ko sa kanya. Ipaglalaban ko si Mark and I will make it sure na ako ang pipiliin niya. No matter what happens.



"Can you do me a favor, Maggie?" I asked her.

"Anything for you, girl." I grinned at her.

"Paki-retouch ng make-up ko, please?" I pleaded and she only laughed.

"You're such a bipolar." She rolled her eyes. "Kanina lang ang lungkot mo, ngayon naman ang kulit mo!" I chuckled and shook my head.

"Tulungan mo na ako magretouch, kailangan kong matalbugan sa kagandahan si Ms Val." Tumayo naman si Maggie at kinuha yung mga cosmetics thingy niya sa vanity mirror/table ng cabin namin.

"Trust me, best friend. Matagal mo ng kinabog yung beauty nun without even trying!" I smiled at her and mouthed a 'thank you'.



We made sure that we'll gain attention when we enter the function hall again. Everyone looked at us and I smiled at them. I even catch a glimpse of Mark smiling me but I didn't return his smile.


I'm going to screw the hell out of his brain while he's dancing with Ms Val. Sisiguraduhin kong siya ang lalapit sa akin mamaya at magmamakaawa siyang samahan ko siya sa loob ng cabin niya.


I danced with almost everyone who asked for a dance. The time came and he asked for a dance, I smiled at him and politely declined. He looked at me and you can tell that he's really surprised that I declined his request.



I danced till I ache on my feet, though it really hurt the !@#$ out of  my feet I chose to remain calm. Why? Because he's staring at me! He's like a hawk watching my every move. But instead of being irritated, I felt happy that he's giving me this attention.


At the time that the party ended, I was the only one left in the function hall. Hindi ko alam kung bakit nagpaiwan ako. Feel ko lang siguro talagang magmuni-muni ngayong gabi pagkatapos ng  mga nangyari sa party na ito.


May napala kaya yung effort kong magpapansin sa kanya? I know, hindi ko agad-agad siyang  mapapapili sa amin sa pamamagitan ng ginawa ko. Napakasimple pa nun para maisip niyang ako dapat ang piliin niya. Baka nga't galit siya sa akin at napakapagdesisyon na siyang tatapusin na niya ito.


Umalis ako ng function hall na iyon ang nasa isip. Ano bang naisip ko at tinanggihan ko siya?! Bakit ba kasi hindi ko pinaghandaan yung ginawa ko! BWISIT!!! Bakit ba kasi ako kilos ng kilos nang hindi nag-iisip!


"HAAAAYYY! Ang tanga-tanga ko talaga! Nakakaini----"Nagulat ako ng may biglang humila sa akin. I was about to scream for help when the guy who grabbed me claimed my mouth. I gasped. 


I opened my eyes and I got scared when I learned that the room was dark. The guy was nipping my lower lip when I spoke. "W-who are you?" I asked while thinking why can't I shove him?!

"You forgot me already?" When I heard his voice, a shiver ran down my spine.


Suddenly, the smell of his perfume registered. The softness of his lips became familiar. I tasted the mixture of sweet, smoke and mint in his mouth. I un-tucked his dress shirt from his pants and inserted my hands in it, running my hands on the hard planes of his stomach. Feeling his rock-hard abs. I withdrew my hands and started to unbutton his shirt.

He licked and nipped my earlobe while unzipping my dress. Our clothes fell into the floor, ans our heated kisses we're becoming more sensual by every seconds. I pulled away from our kiss and grasped for air. 


"I love you, Mark." I said, breathless.


I regret saying it when I felt him tensed up. I mentally slapped myself for being so careless. Why did it have to slip from my lips?! STUPID RIRI!


I was about to take back my words when he kissed me again, this time his kisses were sweet and slow. It was then that I realized that I was on my back on the bed while he's on top of me kissing me, slow and sensual. 


"I love you, Mark." I repeated. He didn't say anything, he just continued kissing me. 

I did my part, everything. I said I love him but he didn't say he love me back. It could only mean one thing, right?


That's when it hit me. This could be our last intimate connection and this could be the end of us. Better to savor it for the last time.