Perfectly Ordinary // Shawn Mendes

fading away

shawn

I gently strum the guitar, trying out different melodies.

Ever since Claudia left, I spend most of my time writing songs. I finally saved up to buy a phone, and my dad helped. We bought an iPhone for the family to share.

A miracle happens, and my mother is becoming healthy. My father is happy again, and my sister is growing up beautifully.

I found a really cool app called Vine where you can post short videos of yourself. So, I posted one of me singing, and the feedback was incredible. I've gained thousands off followers just in these few weeks, and it's taken my mind off of Claudia.

I call Claudia every night and text her every day. She talks little, mostly about how different California is. She has to share a room with her cousin named Kaylie who is 17.

I don't ever want to hang up, so I mostly blabber about any good thing that happens in my life to keep our conversation going. Claudia talks to me less, and it breaks my heart a little more each day.

Eventually, she stops picking up my phone calls and answering my texts. This is what shatters my heart into a million pieces.

I loved her. I loved her so damn much. I was hopelessly infatuated with her. Almost every night since she left, I have the same nightmare: I sing her something that I wrote for her, and she smiles so big. God, I miss her smiles. Just seeing her beautiful smile makes me so damn giddy with happiness. Then, I lean in to kiss her, but before I know it, she's crumbling into dust at my feet. And then I wake up with tears pouring down my cheeks.

I have no way of seeing if she's okay, no way to make her okay. Claudia slowly but surely slips out of my reach, like the dust from my nightmare falling through my fingers.

Time passes and I get older and more well-known in my community. I start to actually perform my songs, and it feels amazing. I'm eventually invited to join MAGCON, where I get to meet the fans I've made over social media.

Time passes and I don't forget about Claudia. Every so often I text her about my performances and ask how she's doing. I tell her as much as I can, but I've never received a response. I'm gaining more fans and popularity, but the only thing I truly care about is hearing from my best friend again.

As time passes, my memory of what we once had begins to fade away.