A Cowboy's Kiss

Chapter Eight

Chapter Eight

          I STARED at him slack jawed. Did I hear him correctly? Did he seriously just say what I think he said. He's attracted to me. Oh My God, I don't think I've ever had someone admit that to me or even found me attractive I'm not exactly the prettiest peach on the tree; but still holy cow! I wonder if Cheryl knows. She prob doesn't. Why would he tell her, he's like 32 and I'm barely 18. This is like taboo stuff. The silence was becoming deafening, but I couldn't say anything I gaped like a guppy for a good five minutes, before Jay got up out of his seat, grabbing his jacket from the back of the chair and left the diner. I was left their hanging.

I started to blush.  

I couldn't breathe.  

I couldn't think.  

What do I think?

He just left. I felt the utter humiliation from his departure. What did he think telling me that would be simple? Hell for all I know he could be lying about it. Then again it explained everything why he couldn't stare at me in the face, why he barely said a thing.....My god.

I just sat their who knows how long, but when I decided to actually leave, my coffee was cold. Walking out of the diner, I was met with the bright sunshine, of the afternoon sky, the sun was high above the sky. Blocking the sun with my hand I looked up at the clouds. What to do; what to do. How do I process this stuff. Where did he run off to we need to talk about this.

Should we talk about this? Or just pretend it didn't happen.

I don't know what to do. I'm at a complete loss.

"Hey Brian are you okay?" came Cheryl's sweet voice behind me. I turned to look at her and engulfed her in a hug. That's all I need right now. A hug. A good old hug.

"Bry-bry?" she questioned, I didn't say anything just dug my face into her hair. I felt her hands wrap around and rub up and down my back. My god it was soothing. All the things I've been missing out. "That feels nice" I whispered to her. She let out a girlish giggle, it was so cute. I chuckled a little nervous admitting to that.

"So what did my uncle want?"

I blushed staring at the wall behind her. She just had to ask didn't she. Do I tell her?

"Umm", How do I say this. You uncle finds me utterly and totally man worthy and delicious that he can't stop thinking about me. I can't say that. He didn't even say it like that.

'I find you attractive Brian and I can't stop thinking about it'

How awkward. "Your uncle just wanted to know how the cottage was coming along"

"Oh" she sounded a little disappointed. Why would she be disappointed. Unless she knows. Wait a minute does she know? Ripping myself away from her I looked her dead in the eyes, at an arms length. My thumb rubbed her arms where I was holding her. She looked up at me with bright blue eyes a little stunned, when I saw the blush creep up I narrowed my eyes, in contemplation. "What do you know Cheryl?" I questioned.

"N-nothing" she whispered looking at anything but me, but I knew better.

Oh I knew so much better.

"Lies. You terrible at lying. So what aren't you telling me?"

Wringing her fingers together nervously I watched her as she looked at her feet. "Come on Cheryl" I coaxed her softly. "Well he kept asking about you all week and I-I-I kinda pieced it together and told him, that he should announce how he feels"

I looked at her. I KNEW IT!

"So you knew the entire time" I watched her blonde hair bob as she nodded her head. "and you decided to play stupid" Her blush intensified. I smiled at her. I laughed. A full hearty laugh. Then sobered up. If she knew then maybe I can talk to her about it.

"What do I do Cheryl?"

AT THE END of the day we had come up with nothing. Well I came up with nothing, Cheryl came up with a butt load of scenarios I did not want to get into. Tell you, that innocent girl with a fiery temper can be a down right pervert! Sitting at the dinning table, I poured over my homework. Calculus. God. How I hated math.

Twirling the pencil, I flipped a page. Reading but not really seeing, nor really paying attention. I couldn't get him out of my head. Shutting the book, I leaned against the chair, rolling my head back to look at the ceiling.

The question was....was I attracted to him?

Of course, he was hot and sexy, broody, could actually be a decent person when he wanted to be. I wonder why he is like that. Is he shy? Or was it something else? He was a jack of all trades, talented in so many ways. Yet I know nothing about him. I wasn't going to ask Cheryl, simply because I'd like to know it from the horses mouth.

I STEPPED OUTSIDE into the dark night air and looked up at the night sky, it was beautiful something I can totally see myself viewing for the rest of my life. This place was growing on me, in so many ways. I have a good nurtured friend who doesn't care that I'm gay. My mother seems happy, really happy. She's in her element. Then there's the predicament of Jay Carter.

Wrapping my arms around my legs, I laid my head on my knees and stared out at the trees. Cocking my head up a bit, I noticed something far off in the bushes, it was dark but the light reflected off the animals eyes. I didn't know what it was but it was staring in my direction. I stared back, I probably shouldn't have. I read somewhere staring an animal directly in the eye was challenging it, trust me I did not want to challenge any animal out here in the middle of know where.

It slowly moved out of the bushes. A wolf. It was beautiful, Grey with white flecks in the coat, deep auburn eyes. It walked slowly towards me not once wavering. I couldn't move, I was captivated. It sat before me. Just sat there. Then it changed and instead of the wolf, sitting there was Mr. Carter. I stared at him in wonder and confusion. What the hell. He walked towards me, his eyes burning with something I just didn't understand.

I untangled myself and sat there, leaning against my arms, just watching him move. He was in nothing but faded dirty ripped jeans, mud caked his chest and some of his face. That five o'clock shadow he always has was prominent on his face and his eyes were still a bright burning auburn. He leaned down before me. I blushed as he placed his hands over mine, one knee between my legs, kneeling into me. I felt the familiar curl of desire in the pit of my stomach. He growled lightly as he leaned in further. He was so close, he smelt so wonderful. I couldn't place it, but it was intoxicating.

"I'm attracted to you" he whispered, "and I can't stop thinking about it"

Leaning closer still. I felt nervous. Excited. Ready.

Ready for what?

His hands caressed mine, softly, gentle. In that moment I knew I wanted him to kiss me. His eyes promised passion on so many levels. I felt so needy for it.

He moved his right hand to my knee and slowly caressed it. Moved up my thigh, I felt my muscles jolt beneath his hand, every fibre of my being was aware of his hand, every movement he made. When he finally kissed me, it was sweet then it was filled with a hot burning fire. He gripped my head between his hands and kissed me, his tongue entering my mouth to capturing me.

With a jolt I woke up in my bed, my breathing laboured and my entire body pulsating with desire. What the hell. I dare say ladies and gentleman that was my very first erotic dream. Sighing, I put my hand over my eyes and breathed trying to control myself, I was covered in sweat. Looking over to my alarm clock, it said 5.30 am.

Sitting up my blanket pooled around my waist, leaving my bare chest to the onslaught of the early morning air, I shivered. Leaning over to turn on my bedside lamp, I flung the blankets off me, and looked at my crotch. I sighed. To do something about it or just leave it. Shaking my head, I decided to ignore it and walked into the bathroom. Turning on the shower, I climbed in. So thankful that our plumbing was fixed.

The hot water cascaded down over me, in a hot wave. Relaxing all my muscles. My fingers through my hair, I leaned against the wall with my arm, watching the water go down the drain. I got lost in my thoughts and my dream.