Chapter 15. Alten

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There is nothing.

As far as I can tell, I am standing on nothing, and there is nothing at all around me. I don't just mean that it's dark and I can't see anything, I mean that there is literally nothing.

I've never had a dream like this before.

Alten isn't here. This is the first time this has ever happened since I imagined him into being.

Where is he?

I shout his name into the darkness around me, but there is nothing, not even an echo. I call out again, but again there is no reply.

I have no idea why this is happening or how I can stop it, and I'm scared. I feel tears on my face and realize that I'm crying. I reach up a hand to wipe the tears away. It's so dark here that I can't even see my hand in front of my face.

I scream Alten's name into the dark emptiness, over and over, until my throat grows hoarse and all that I can manage is a strained whisper.

I can feel myself falling, slowly at first, but then faster and faster. I feel wind rushing through my hair and I'm crying out, grabbing wildly around me in panic trying to find something to hold on to, anything, but there is nothing.

My eyes snap open and I'm back in my bed again. I can hear the sound of Lily's quiet breathing beside me. For a moment, I feel safe, and then I remember what I was dreaming about and I can feel terror rising in my chest.

What's going on? Where is Alten? Is he okay? Did Colin kill him?

Can fantasy boyfriends be killed by other people's fantasy boyfriends?

Tears are dripping out of my eyes and onto my pillow. My hands are shaking and I can't make them stop. A sob escapes my throat and I quickly swallow it, scared that I'll wake Lily. I pull my comforter up and wrap my arms around it, wishing that it was Alten instead.

Just yesterday I'd thought that everything in my life was perfect. Now, everything in my life is falling apart, and there's no way to pick up the pieces or put them back together again.

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