Wrong Impression

2. The most selfish, self-absorbed asshole on this planet

Tom looked at the school parking lot at his feet, three stories down. So peaceful, so inviting. One more step and he could fall into its grey embrace. He could spread his arms out artistically and take a dive, kiss the concrete. Because he deserved it. He totally deserved to fall and break his neck for being the most selfish, self-absorbed asshole on this planet.

How? How could he do that to Jimmy? His brother, the only one who cared about him, who'd always been there, who was sacrificing his future for the spoiled brat that was Tom. His only excuse was that he hadn't known. He should've known, but he didn't. Life sucked. High school sucked.

He heard footsteps behind him. Damn, that crowd in the parking lot had surely spotted him up here like the potential suicidee he was. Someone was probably coming up to stop him. Or maybe it was Jimmy, there to wring his neck.

"Tom!"

It was Jimmy. And the sound of his voice pushed all the bravado out of Tom. As much as he tried to play it off, accept what he'd done, he couldn't. He couldn't handle this. Tears filled his eyes as his insides constricted in agony. The pain was driving him insane, because it was more powerful than anything he'd ever felt. Broken bones, cuts and burns had nothing on this. And he couldn't walk it off. The only walk he could take was off the school.

"Step off the ledge," Jimmy said, his voice strained. "And I mean towards me, not over the edge."

"I didn't know," Tom whispered.

"Yes, I got that, now come to me."

Tom glanced over his shoulder. Jimmy was a couple of feet away, his hand extended, the wind blowing his black hair away from his face. But Tom looked beyond that, into his brother's dark brown eyes. There was determination there. But Tom could see beyond that, could see Jimmy's shattered soul, betrayed by his own brother. By the girl he loved.

Tom's knees weakened and his body swayed towards the void below.

"Tom!" Jimmy yelled. "I don't care, I get it. Step away from the fucking edge, now!"

Tom let himself fall on his ass, his face in his hands. Jimmy lied, he did care. And Tom wasn't strong enough to do what was probably best for everyone.

Jimmy's arms wrapped around his middle and he dragged Tom away from the edge of the building. Once they were practically in the middle of the roof, Jimmy took Tom's sunglasses off and forced him to look him in the eyes.

"What the hell were you thinking?"

"I'm so sorry, I never meant to hurt you," Tom sobbed. "I should've known, but I didn't."

"No, stop."

"I didn't know Bella was your girlfriend. I should've known. You've been going out with her for months. And I... I almost..." He'd almost given her everything. His heart, among other things. Well, she'd taken care of that. He didn't think he'd hated anyone more in his life.

But that didn't make the rest go away. Not the kissing, the touching, almost going all the way. They'd been half naked when the sick bitch whispered it in his ear, "Your brother is really good. Let's see if you can measure up."

It had felt like she'd hit him over the head with a chair. He'd gotten out of there right away, finally putting two and two together, realizing that she'd been playing them both for months.

She knew that between school and their jobs, Tom and Jimmy barely saw each other. She knew they had more important things to talk about, like food, school and what extra activities their mystery sponsor had funded lately.

Tom knew Jimmy had a girlfriend. Bella had been important enough to mention. He'd seen Jimmy more lively, happy. Tom thought he'd be like that too when he met her. How could he have guessed it was the same girl? Jimmy called her Izzy.

"I know," Jimmy said. "You couldn't have known. I never introduced you to her."

"I almost slept with her, Jimmy."

He stiffened, his grip on Tom's arm tightening to the point it hurt, but Tom didn't care, he deserved the pain.

"Almost," he finally said. "This is not your fault. It's hers. She already broke me. Don't let her break you, too."

Tom nodded for lack of something better to do. It wasn't that easy, because he knew the truth. Bella hadn't broken Jimmy. He had. And he'd never forgive himself.

"I'm done," Jimmy said, his voice low and measured. "Done with her, done with this stupid weakness people call love. Maybe it works for rich people, but it only gets in our way."

"Too true," Tom mumbled. Love made people incredibly stupid, pushed them off buildings. Yeah, he was done with that himself.

"So I'm going to focus on what must be done, from now on. This whole relationship thing was very selfish of me in the first place," Jimmy continued.

"No, that's not true. You've sacrificed enough. You should be the one going to college while I work. You're much smarter than me."

"Hey." Jimmy yanked Tom's arm. "We've had this conversation already. Do I need to tell you to focus on your studies?"

"No, sir," Tom answered mechanically.

"Don't call me sir. I'm one year older than you."

Tom almost smirked, but he couldn't. He wasn't sure he could smile anymore. They stood in silence for a while, starting at the cloudless sky of Tucson.

"Izzy's dead to me," Jimmy finally said. "You're fortunately not. I don't want to ever talk about this again. It's gone. Clean slate."

Tom nodded. He didn't ever want to talk about this either. About the biggest mistake he'd ever made. About how he broke Jimmy's heart.

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Welcome to another exciting episode of Wrong Impression and the start of regular updates. Yay! Thank you for joining me on this potentially epic adventure.

Damn, did I go into deep waters with a lifeline? I think I did. Because this is where Tom's story starts.

What's your first impression? How about Jimmy? Also, do you believe I handled the situation with enough grace?

Thanks so much for reading and if you enjoyed it, please consider leaving a vote and comment.