It's That 'I Hate You' Kind of Love

Chapter Twenty Four

**When you see ITIHYKOL that stand for It's That I Hate You Kind of Love**

Fold and place. Fold and place. Fold and place, I repeated in my head, trying to focus on packing and not hugging my friend to cry it all out. Fold and place.

I breathed out as I finished my box of clothes, sealing the container with a long strip of heavy duty duct tape.

Done.

"When do you think he's coming?" Bailey asked quietly from where she sat on my pillows, leaning against my white headboard. Her brown eyes were swimming with worry, so I looked back down to bring a square to me and shove the last of my clothes in the second worn cardboard box labelled 'Charlotte's clothes' in black sharpie.

Sighing through my nose I told her I didn't know. My hand reached on the edge of the bed and found my small purple bag full of things from my bathroom, and a blue bag of a few of my extra possessions I was bringing. These objects mostly included framed pictures of my friends and family, shells from days at the beach, a Cardinal feather, the necklace my mom had gotten me for my birthday, a friendship bracelet from Brianne, a little book of inspirational quotes and a few other items. I stuffed the two bags in another box named 'Plush' where the two plush animals I couldn't part with were, and my blanket from when I was a baby.

I couldn't bare to part with any of these.

Smoothing down my thin, navy hoodie, I patted the full box of books and crawled to Bailey's side on the bed I was going to miss. It had been so hard to choose which of my books to bring, they were all treasures to me and one of my greatest prides was my large

collection. Books were my escape; I was really going to need them at the pack house.

Looking around my room I felt a pang of sadness at all the memories I packed away to bring with me. It wasn't the same without my camera set on my chest of drawers beside the frames displaying great times. It wasn't the same without three jackets messily dangling on the desk chair that looked like it would fall apart any second. The desk normally covered in ink-less pens, crumpled chemistry homework and broken pencils was clear- instead sporting my lavender duffle bag. I almost didn't recognize the round, green area rug that had been covered in a bundle of ripped jeans, blue or green shirts and the occasional combat boot and sneaker. It didn't look like my room any more.

I sighed again, leaning my head back into the support of my twin-sized bed. A bed that I had slept in for over a decade; a place I had dreamed in, cried in, wished in, snuggled in and- hid from monsters in. Now it was spoiled, known as the place where Carson haunted my nightmares every painful hour.

My eyes were stinging from lack of sleep in the light that flooded from my windows, filtering past my thin white curtains that sported a horrible attempt at splatter paint. Bailey, John, Stacy and I had thought it had been a good idea at the time. I used to dislike the unkept look of them, but now I gazed at the curtains fondly, relishing in the funny memory.

Those were spoiled too. My memories with Stacy and John would always be tainted by how our friendship had ended when I needed them. Carson had ruined everything for me and yet I wanted to see him.

It was just not possible for me to deny it. I wanted to see him, even though a part of me was frightened and hateful of his kind. I needed to. Since yesterday painful blasts of hurt have been punching my stomach and I knew it was because I wasn't near him. We had read about it in school; that a mate to a werewolf's body will go through withdrawals if separated for a long amount of time.

When it first happened last night it felt like I was being torn apart, there had been silent screaming for the excruciatingly long seconds that it lasted. I'll never forget it. So, as much as I despised the fact I really needed to see him; I needed this pain to go away!