Time of the Year

13

"Have I done something wrong?" He asked, no matter how much he feared the answer he needed to know. He was walking on eggshells and couldn't continue to tiptoe around her, it was tiring and wearing him down.
She looked genuinely surprised as she pulled back the covers on her side of the bed, like she had no idea what he was talking about. "No...why?" She frowned.
"Your...you've been distant...distracted...I just wondered if it was something I'd done." Explained Jacob giving her a quizzical look, waiting for something more.
"Have I?" She really didn't see it, these last few days how far away she's been.
"I've asked you several times if you were okay and you've brushed me off." He frowned and began thinking, could he have imagined it? Could he be looking for issues where none exists?
"I'm fine." She smiled and cuddled into his side.
"I'm fine..." He sighed. "...I caught you starring into space this morning...I had a whole conversation with you and you don't remember..." His frustration built. "...I refuse to believe it's all in my head...there something going on in here..." He kissed the top of her head. "...well?"
She smiled up at him. "I didn't realise I was being distant...I...there is something I'm thinking about...but it's fine...I'm fine...I didn't mean to worry you..." She closed the distance and placed a loving kiss on his lips. "...I'm not worried...I promise...just thinking..." Her words were light and she said them a smile, although still a little dubious Jacob accepted her explanation. "...how do you feel about Christmas shopping tomorrow? Drop Grace at school and go spoil her rotten."
Nodding his head thoughtfully. "Sure...I could go for that." He was playing it cool, in reality he couldn't wait. To join the bustling shoppers looking for the ideal gift for a loved one, not expensive gifts necessarily but thoughtful, meaningful gifts that will be cherished. Then there was his secret shopping he had planned for connie, he had a Christmas eve surprise already sorted and hidden in his sock draw but he wanted to find a real present, something that would show her just how much he treasured her.
"Oh and..." She interrupted his musings. "...its the first weekend in December this weekend...expect Grace to pester you to get the decorations down from the loft...I may have told her to see you." She told him sweetly.
"Is that right?" He chuckled amazed at her plotting. "And who got them down last year?"
"I did..." She said matter of factly and her innocent expression tickled him. "...what's the point of having a big strong man in the house if I don't make use of him?"
"I'm being used!" He through his hands up feigning disgust.
"You love it." She laughed at him as she snuggled further down in the bed and into his side.
"No..." He switched off the lamp then hugged her to him. "...I love you."
"And I love you too muscles." She answered before drifting off to sleep.
...
His hands were sweaty, they had been since he woke this morning. It was Christmas eve and with nowhere to be the three of them had made camp in the living room watching tacky feel good festive films all afternoon. He watched mindlessly his thoughts wandered till Connie's voice broke through.
"Come on Grace sweetie...time for bed." She smiled and he realised the credits were rolling up the screen.
"But mum..."
"No buts...Santa only comes to children that are asleep." Connie reasoned and Jacob had to smirk, there was no way Grace was falling for that one and he was right.
"I know you wrap my presents tonight mum...I'm not daft!" The young girl rolled her eyes.
"Even more reason for you to go to bed now...you don't want me tried and ratty tomorrow!" Connie had her daughter thinking now. They were so alike, they had the same thinking face mused Jacob as he watched the pair interact.
"Night mum...Night Jacob."
"Night firecracker." he said accepting her embrace.
When the coast was clear he asked. "So where did you hide her presents?"
"Under the stairs..." Connie said feeling pleased with herself that neither him nor Grace had managed to find them or weedle the information from her.
"But I looked there." he protested with a frown.
"Your a child! In the boxes marked medical files..." she said standing up. "...I'll make us a drink...And don't ever tell her..." she pointed at him in warning. "...That hiding place has served me well over the years."
They sat together wrapping Grace's presents, their backs learning against the sofa laughing at Jacob's attempts at tying ribbon and more often than not Connie took over and finished the job to her exacting standards. He knew she'd want the gifts to looked their best, he'd imagined it.
"Ok...next..." She held out her hand waiting for the next gift, distracted with taking a sip of her hot drink.
Jacob nervously held out a little black box, his hand shaking and heart thundering in his chest as he watch Connie reach out to take it.
"What's that..." She asked curiously and snatched her hand back quickly as if burnt. "...Jacob...what's that?"
He flicked open the lid to reveal an elegant diamond ring, he took in the sight of her and gave her a moment to collect her thoughts. He saw all the emotions, first panic, a lot of panic. He expected it, as long as she didn't decide to run, he knew it was a risk.
He thinks he can see disbelief, the way her month opened and closed with no sound escaping, the way her brow furrowed as she scowled at the ring.
"Connie?" He whispered, emotion causing his throat to tighten, the volume of his voice held down. Her eyes flitted back and fourth between him and the ring.
"Con...I love you..." He shifted to face her properly. "...I never want to be without you...you and Grace are my world...I've no idea what I've done to deserve this...this life you've shown me...this happiness but I'm going to grab it with both hands...I'm a lucky man...I know that and I won't ever take that for granted...I will spend my life showing you how much I love you...and I do...I love you so much it hurts...your intelligence...your smile, wit and humour...how you can strike the fear of God into people one minute then comfort and support the next...I love how strong you can be and I love that you can be so vulnerable too when no one is watching...here at home with me and I love that you've given me the chance to see the many sides you hide...I feel honoured that you've let me in...into your life...into your daughter's life...I love you and I love Grace..." he took a calming breath. "...Connie...sweet cheeks...Will you marry me?"
He watched with bated breath as she tried in vain to wipe the tears from her face, she kept him waiting. "Its me that doesn't deserve you...after everything I've put you through...you shouldn't be here...you should have run a mile and you certainly shouldn't have agreed to move in...I'm sure you must be mad." She smiled through her tears.
"So what if I am...maybe I like being mad or maybe it's you that can't see how wonderful you are...how much you...not clinical lead you, but the real you has to offer...Now if you wouldn't mind putting me out of my misery...we can discuss my mental health later." He smile kindly at her, silently praying for a yes.
She nodded and his heart leapt. "Yes as in we'll talk about my madness later or..."
"Yes...I'll marry you." She confirmed laughing through her tears.
Jacob couldn't quite believe what he was hearing, this beautiful amazing woman he held in his arms was his to share his life with.
...
"So this has got to be pretty close." Murmured Connie as she laid in Jacob's arms on the sofa watching an old film of Jacob's choice. Her back to his chest, their left hands linked resting on her hips.
"Mmm?" Jacob wondered contentedly.
"You told me once you imagined the perfect Christmas, our Christmas...now here we are...watching a 'classic' film...fairy lights and the fire on, candles burning that smell of cinnamon and pine trees...the presents are wrapped...bowed my me..." She smiled up at him as it dawned on him, everything was as he told her, everything he'd dreamed and wished for.
"Right down to the diamond ring on your finger..." He added following her line of thought. "...I couldn't imagine anything more perfect." He kissed her head.
"What about the other thing you mentioned?" Connie asked tentatively, almost as if she was testing the ground.
"Arr...well..." He nuzzled into her neck. "...maybe that's something we could work on for next Christmas." His remark was flippant, light hearted and nothing more than a off handed teasing but he felt her stiffen in his arms.
"Connie...I was joking...what we have now is perfect...more than I could ever want...I don't need anything else." He didn't know how to make it any clearer.
"I have a confession..." She turned over to lay on her back, giving Jacob a full view of her face and the slight grin that had taken root. "...What if I told you...through some miracle and probably more luck than judgment...everything thing you spoke of...well apart from the swollen abdomen and kicking...as happened..." She moved his hand to her flat stomach.
"Your serious?" He asked bewildered. His first thought was that he'd misunderstood what she was saying.
"Seven weeks." She confirmed but even then he had trouble putting the pieces together, crazy thoughts went through his head. Seven weeks, what happened seven weeks ago, well apart from the obvious. Then he thought about Connie's change of mood, he far away looks, could she have just found out. Why hadn't she said anything sooner?
"Jacob?" Connie pulled him back into the room and all he could see was their joined hands lightly resting over their baby and the Christmas lights reflecting in the shine of her ring.
"Are you okay?" She checked and it occurred to him, he'd not really said anything, that he'd left her hanging. Waiting for some sort of sign he was happy.
"I love you." Was all he could manage as tears began to cloud his vision and there was no blinking them away.
They must have looked completely mad, grinning at each other like idiots, joy radiating from them.
"This is really happening...you want this?" It was ridiculous to ask but his intelligence had left him, he was floating somewhere in the vicinity of cloud nine. He was dreaming, he must be. Thinking back over everything they'd been through over the last two year, even longer since they'd first met, it amazed him how they could be here, now, like this.
The couple talked happily till well into the night and the next morning they woke with Grace smiling as they watched her tear open the immaculately wrapped gifts, sharing knowing glances. They'd wait to share their news.
His attention was drawn to the song playing in the background. "The most wonderful time of the year." This time he couldn't help but agree, it was more than wonderful, it was perfect for them.

The End

Thank you everyone for reading, it's been a pleasure to write and I've enjoying all your wonderful words of encouragement.
Hopefully I'll be back soon with a new idea.

C.J xxx