Tiara.

5. Back To Life

What Bianca said hits me. Yes, I deserve to live the way I want but I can't help on thinking how disgusted I am with myself.  Since I've sold my body to Mr. Maunt, I didn't felt any thing valuable about myself anymore. He was the only guy I selpt with and he knows where I'm spending the money he's giving me, so there are times that he double his pay. It lasted for almost 3 years. I was like his mistress the only difference is that I am being paid. When he told me he can't afford to pay for my service anymore and that they're moving out, I felt nothing, I didn't even feel sad. All that matters to me is how am I going to continue my last year in college. That is the reason why I was tempted to sleep with Mr. Maunt's friend, Mr. Smith. Like the usual, I started out babysitting and maybe Mr. Maunt told him what I do for money that's why Mr. Smith offered me that  without any hesitation. Mr. Smith gave me enough to pay my rent for half a year. He's a kind man afterall and we only did it once. 

The last time I remember being paid for sex was just a few nights back, with that grumpy guy with a name that I don't remember. I slept with 3 different guys but I slept more with Mr. Maunt, I couldn't even count it. I sighed.

"HEY!" Bianca interrupted my thoughts, "are you even listening to what I am saying here?"

"I'm sorry, I was just thinking.." I said to her, shaking my head.

"What is it that you were thinking then?" Bianca asked while raising her brows

"That I'll stop doing this." 

"Stop doing what?" Bianca asked, she knows exactly what I am talking about. I know she just wants to hear the exact words.

"Selling my body.. Since I have saved enough money. I'll find a decent job after graduation."

I have felt Bianca's hug right before I said the word graduation. I know she wants this to happen. Having her as a bestfriend was a real blessing in disguise. I never have thought I'll have someone so precious, we have a bond that no matter how tangled it may get, it wouldn't be broken. She stood up with me no matter what, I wouldn't be sane if she's not around. 

Then I heard her sob, she's crying! I didn't thought she'd get this emotional. Knowing her, she always acts tough after all. 

"Are you crying?" I said teasingly as I tried to push her gently in order for me to see her face and she was indeed crying.

"I'm just happy bitch!" she said while wiping her tears away. She's the only one who could call me bitch and doesn't make me feel bad about it.

"You promise me that?" Bianca asked as soon as she stopped sobbing

"Pinky Promise." I said, cheerfully.

"Okay then, let's go back to what we were doing.." Bianca said as she shifts her attention to the pants scattered on the floor, she grabbed it and then put it all in a basket..

"Those are mine!" I protested

"HAH! Do I look like acquiring ownership of this junk?" she sarcastically said and continues "I'm gonna throw all these baggy jeans away. Their sizes are way too huge for you. No wonder why nobody notices you at school."

"I don't wanna be noticed, remember?" I said

"You agreed to bring back the old you, remember?" she said back, her hands on her waist and her brows are raised.

"Yeah yeah, go ahead. I don't like those stuffs anyway." 

"You must have suffered a lot while wearing this hideous outfits." she disgustingly said as she puts away the clothes that she dislikes.