Random Spam// Ella

Crushes #2

You know that feeling you get when your crush does something really idiotic or cute or funny and you just sit there thinking, " I wish I could look at that face everyday for the rest of my life."

And you just sit there with this stupid look in your eyes like you're having the best day ever? Because whatever your crush did  just completely made your day a million times better. 

You know that feeling you get when your crush talks about the person that she loves?

And you feel like you need to die and cry at the same time-- like someone just STABBED you in the gut.

You know that feeling when your crush says "I love you" but she only means it platonically and you have to say it back like a friend and its really awkward because you actually think you love her as much more than a friend?

You know that feeling you get when you and your crush are dared to kiss and you just have this pit in your stomach whereas she's all ecstatic about it and you believe, just for a second, that she might like you back and then remember someone else has her heart?

And then you kiss and it's not even that good but you just want to do it over and over and over.

And you keep reminding yourself how ugly and unloved you are and how messed up your life is.

And you keep reminding yourself how pretty and loved and how perfect her life is.

And you get over it

And then you try to have a crush on someone else.

And you sit here on wattpad complaining because you can't complain to anyone else.

Someone help me.