Spaces in between (Stockholm Syndrome: Extended chapters)

June 2020 (6)

~Archer~

Felix sometimes made me mad. Sometimes I was justified and sometimes I was completely off. Like all humans I sometimes got cranky and blamed everyone who so much as breathed next to me.

I had just spent hours on the seat of a car. Initially it was comfortable but overtime even the cushioned seats of a BMW got too hard for my butt. I was exhausted. And when Felix refused to help me pack after we arrived at his apartment, I just lost it.

"Seriously?! You are just going to lie there?" I yelled.

Felix turned slightly. He was lying on the bed. He'd literally jumped on the bed the moment we got into the room.

"Yep", he said casually.

"You have got to be kidding me! Did you see the state of the living room? Never mind that, I don't want to be tripping over suitcases in here!"

"Pancakes, come to bed", he said lazily.

"I'm going to work tomorrow. I can't just leave everything as is!"

"Yes you can", he merely said.

I opened the closet. I had never seen such a mess in my life. There weren't a lot of clothes there but they looked like they had just been thrown there. As far as I knew, Felix was very particular about order. His apartment back at Berkeley had always been organized. Unless that was all for show.

"God Felix, what the hell happened in here?!"

"Will you stop yelling? It's irritating now", he said clearly.

"I would stop yelling if you could just help me!" I yelled.

I knew I was beyond being unreasonable. Felix had been driving for hours; he was tired, quite possibly more than me. I had no right to be yelling at him like that. I was tired too. I also had anticipatory anxiety about work and I was taking it out on him.

I was excited about starting work. I was also anxious. Like leaving Berkeley it was unsettling. Not only would I be new at work, I had yet to find my way around Los Angeles. Unpacking was something I could control. I wanted to do that so I didn't have to think about my day the next day.

I placed my head on the closet door gently and sighed.

"Can't you just..." I started and suddenly stopped.

Felix was standing behind me. I hadn't seen him walk to me, but I could feel him standing behind me. I could feel his breathing on my neck.

"Come to bed", he whispered.

"I-I can't", I said quietly.

"Pancakes, I could see the worry on your face from a distance. You need to rest. Or we could hit the shower".

"I need to unpack", I said.

His hand travelled down my arm to my hand. He took it in his and turned me around to face him.

"I'll unpack tomorrow, I promise", he said sweetly.