My book of random

Story 5

So I was about 7 I think (2009...?) and one day, I needed to pee.

Before I continue, you need to know that I hate doing things while being watched. If you have eyes, you're creepy to me. Even teddy bears give me the creeps. One time, I was getting changed in my bedroom and I felt like I was being watched by all my stuffed toys, so I paused and turned them all around before changing. Yup. That paranoid. *anyways...*

So, I needed to pee. La dee dah, I went to the bathroom, but before I could do anything, I saw a little jumpy spider.
I took my shoe off and chased it around the bathroom for a good 5 minutes before I finally squashed it, and then I felt comfortable enough to pee.
Pulled my pants down, sat on the loo, looked at a poster on the wall in front of me. It was a car poster. We had a few of those.
Anyways, I looked at this poster and saw this freaky long hairy spider leg sticking out from beneath it.

I nearly pissed myself.

I didn't tho, rather I whipped my pants up, screamed bloody murder and ran outta the hell outta there as fast as I could go.
Like friggin greased lightning.

I screeched for dad, he went into the bathroom with his thong to kill it. I was hiding behind him watching to make sure he'd squash it properly, and he did.

Boy, he DID.

The bloody thing exploded in a firework of green spider sh*t all over the room. Nasty. 🤢

I didn't want to go back in there ever again 😬
Still don't 😅
Good thing we moved house 🏡 😊 (not because of the green firework tho)