chaos ~ fred weasley

19. pause

The time leading up Christmas goes by faster than expected. I spend every day with Lee and the twins, and I've also had a girls day with Ms. Weasley and Ginny, which I really enjoyed. I also see Harry a lot, which means I see Ron too which is always fun. I adore it at the Burrow and I never want to leave

When I wake up on Christmas morning, I leap out of bed and pull the covers off of Lee. He groans in annoyance but I sing Jingle Bells even louder. I knock on the twin's door three times before throwing it open. I run in to find the both of them still asleep. Rolling my eyes, I run over to Fred's bed first and plop down beside him. He's sleeping on his stomach, and his hair is messy around his head.

I stroke his hair back tenderly from his face and lean in close, whispering his name gently. He doesn't stir. This calls for extreme measures. "FRED WEASLEY! WAKE YOUR RANK ASS THE HELL UP!" I yell in his ear. He sits straight up so fast that I have no time to move out of the way- our foreheads smack together with a loud thumping sound, and we both groan.

"That was your fault," he says accusingly, his voice croaky.

"What day is it?" George mumbles from across the room, slowly sitting up and rubbing his eyes.

"Oh, good, you're awake!" I say happily, forgetting about the pain in my forehead for a moment.

"Of course I am, the whole of the UK heard your bloody screaming," he replies.

"And so they should," I say decidedly. "It's important that they all know that IT'S CHRISTMAS MORNING!"

Fred laughs. "I'm guessing you like Christmas," he says, and it's partly true. Lee and I try to like Christmas as much as we can to distract us from the painful reminder that this day is- it's been eight years since the accident, to the day. I always tend to avert my attention from that though and focus on Christmas itself.

"I love it!" I say, cringing inwardly at the slight shake in my voice, but Fred doesn't notice. Instead, he sits up and climbs out of bed, and then all of a sudden I realize he's shirtless. I yelp and cover my eyes (not that I don't want to look, but I'm very uncomfortable) and try to make my way to the door. Their room is a mess, though, so I almost trip and fall over several things on my way out. Finally, I find the door and leave, but not before banging my forehead painfully on the door frame, which makes the twins roar with laughter.

I head back into my room, where Lee, surprisingly enough, is already dressed. He smiles at me when I come in. "Merry Christmas!" he says cheerfully, not making eye contact with me.

I look at him carefully. "Pause," I murmur, running over to him and hugging him tightly. This is something we came up with when we used to fake being okay when people would ask where our parents were. We'd 'pause', have a break and let our emotions out, and then unpause and be okay again.

"Nine years," Lee whispers into my ear, stroking my hair softly.

"Nine years," I confirm, to remind me that it was even real. I single tear rolls down my cheek and I don't bother to wipe it away.

"You know there were times at Hogwarts before you came when I was sure I'd forgotten what they looked like," he says quietly as he pulls away.

I nod. "I did too. Never completely, but the time I woke up and realized I couldn't remember what mom's laugh sounded like..."

"Or dad's awful singing," he says.

"I remember that," I say, smiling a little. "He'd always sing Justin Bieber in the kitchen when he was doing the dishes."