Just A Kiss (A Jaspar Fic) [Discontinued until Editing Is Complete]

11.

Caspar's POV

It was about 9pm at night. I was standing in front of our apartment, the keys still in my hand. I lifted my hand to knock at the door but brought it right back, just like that, not having enough courage to get through with it. I had decided to call him before coming over but that went to shit when I couldn't grow a pair and click on the call button.

I hated how much I was scared of his reaction. He used to be the last person I was afraid of. He was just so tiny. I missed the days where we would just cuddle right in front of the TV. He would fit right into my arms because he was so adorably tiny. Joe would blush throughout that, and he looked so cute doing that.

Watching him get flustered used to be-and still is- my favorite thing. To see the hint of crimson on his cheeks was so rare that I would take pride in whenever I got that reaction out of him. God I missed him. And now thinking about him made me want to see him again.

I turned the knob to strangely find it unlocked. Geez, he should seriously lock that up, people nowadays are not to be trusted.

I slowly walked in, finding it quite strange that there was no noise coming from within the house. There was pin drop silence in the air. I started walking quietly, not wanting to disturb the silence.

Just as I was going to walk towards Joe's room, I noticed a light coming from towards the sofa. As I reached there, the sight that I saw made my heart physically ache.

There he was, sleeping on the couch. He was snuggled underneath a blanket, his laptop right in front of him. This was so typical of him, falling asleep while using his laptop. I cooed at how adorable he looked while sleeping like that, completely forgetting about our current situation and only realizing it when the keys danging from my hand made a jingling sound. I grudgingly peeled my eyes away from the adorable sight and clutched the keys in my hand.

I walked towards the nearby counter, placing the keys just so that it would be easily visible to him when he wakes up. I also grabbed a sticky note from the refrigerator and a pen that we always kept there if we needed to leave notes to the other or something. I quickly scrambled down the simple words,

                     I'm sorry.
                                     -C

on it and placed it near the keys. Realizing that my task had been completed, I decided it was best for me to leave. But before I left the apartment, I started walking towards Joe, as if my feet had a mind of their own. I stopped when I reached to where Joe was sleeping and knelt down so I was on eye level with him.

I looked at him while he was sleeping, noticing just then how peaceful and serene he looked. I just realized how creepy-stalker type thing it was for me to do, staring at him like that, so I looked away, blushing at the earlier thoughts inside my head.

I looked back soon enough though, not having anything better to look at. I sighed realizing it was getting pretty late and I had to head back to the hotel. But, instead of walking away, I did something that even I surprised myself with.

I leaned down, closer to Joe's face and placed a soft kiss, right on his cheek. I pulled back immediately though, just realizing what I had done, blushing furiously. Also I didn't want to wake him up and create a ruckus if he found out I was in the apartment without his knowledge.....which he soon would figure out anyway,  considering the keys and the note, the sole purpose of my visit.

I was soon brought back to the present at the sound of a notification on my phone. I didn't look at it, though, clearly not in the mood to deal with other people. I looked at the door and then at Joe.

Gritting my teeth in frustration, I finally stood up. With one last lingering look at Joe, I backed away from him slowly, feeling extremely sad about leaving him right now. O kept walking away though just noticing the tears that were threatening to escape my eyes. I shut the apartment door behind me, immediately falling to the ground as soon as I did so, the realness of the situation hitting me like a wrecking ball.

I fucked up. I fucked up big time, didn't I? Why couldn't I be a better friend to him? I cupped my face in my hands and finally let the tears stream down my face now, letting it all out. How did I let this happen to us? Thinking back to the past couple of days I could only ask myself this

-What happened to us?

A/N

Hey guys! I know it was a short af chapter but well... JASPAR FLUFF !
I had been trying to implement something cute in this series for awhile now and found the perfect opportunity in this chapter! I hope you guys liked it. Leave a vote if you did and comment if there are any errors in my writing style! I would loove to hear your opinions! Anyways I gotta go guys so bye! Xoxo