How to Know You're Obsessed with Artemis Fowl

4

• You want to know the parts of the brain that humans used to use for magic
• You wish Lady Hethrington Smythe's Hedgerow was a real book
• You have searched for that book in a library before
• You are ecstatic about the movie being released late this year or next year
• You're also slightly worried because you think they'll ruin it
• You don't want a bunch of people to join the fandom
• But you want to be able to talk to more people about to
• You wish there were posters for the books
• You don't like recommending the books to other people because you're worried they'll hate it
•You're also worried they'll love it and be a bad fan
• You argue with someone if they get facts wrong
• You call stupid people "N'Zall"
• You wish it was socially acceptable to give yourselves names from books
• You want a fairy communicator
• You always wear silver
• You think of moon madness every-time you see the moon
• Snow makes you think do the Artic Incident
•You can name multiple Icelandic cities
• You know about pollution in European and Asian cities
• You know about Linfen
• You always watch for a distraction
•You really want to see a guinea pig trying to pick up a sword
• You look for people with ragged pupils
• You cry throughout the end of the Last Guardian
• You wish you had lots of horns
• You know the exact details of the battle of Taillte
• You want to know all of Butler's old missions
• You want to know what drug Cudgeon was using
• You want to know the workout routine of Butler and Juliette, if only to marvel at it
• You imagine Arno Blunt in a crop top that you could buy at Forever 21
• You check to see if people have fake and menacing teeth, like Arno Blunt
• You want to read the fairy book
• You want to find a sprite in Ho Chi Minh City
• You want to use Cam Foil to scare you're enemies
• You're confused about Foaly and his family (he has at least one child who is 14, but what?)
• You can list the 8 fairy families off the top of your head
• You love Turnball and Leonor together
• You argue with people about Krakens
• You can't eat a nut without thinking of Artemis
• You think Vinyaya's death shouldn't have happened
• You recite many of The Book's commandments by heart
• You have a love-hate relationship with Opal
• You think that Opal deserved a death more fitting for her
• You tried to learn the piano to be like Artemis
• You want to know how Miles and Beckett grew up
• You think Vinyaya and Root should've gotten together
• You think Lily Frond is awful
• You wonder if she was actually related to the king
• You wonder how big the Fowl Estate is
• You wonder what Artemis's IQ is
• You wonder what Minerva's IQ is
• You want to know what happened in the rest of Artemis's life
• You want to know how Minerva and Artemis compare
• You want to visit the spot where big moments happen in the books
• You wonder about Artemis's childhood
• You love Artemis's case file
• You want to know everything about what Artemis did before fairies
• You feel bad for Artemis's classmates
• You wonder about Jon Spiro's future
• You wonder how much money Artemis really has
• You wonder if Dr. Poe retired because of Artemis
• You wish to name all your children after book characters
• You want entire blueprints of Fowl Manor
• You want to know all of Butler's aliases
• You want to know how Loafer McGuire turned out
• You wish you had the same ability to come up with comebacks as the book characters
• You aspire to the look and attitude of Carla Frazetti
• You want to visit Mulch's apartment
• You want to know where Damon Kronski got all those diamonds
• You want to know all about the fairy rivalries
• You want to know more fairy history

If I repeated any, just let me know please. I'm so sorry for taking so long to update. I'm having a hard time coming up with them. If you have ideas, please let me know.

Love,
holly