A Hidden Past

Chapter 7

Emily's POV: 

It felt like an extremely long drive back to the rest of the team, everything that Ms Jareau had mentioned about Angus was replaying in my mind. I couldn't get the feeling that he had done something to JJ out of my mind. Thinking of JJ also made me think about her older sister, Rosaline. I didn't know too much about Rosaline apart from the fact that she had killed herself when she was seventeen. I'd never pressure JJ into telling myself or the team about why her sister committed suicide but I feel that there's so much that JJ is holding back that could help us catch this fucking bastard once and for all. 

It was slowly approaching 6pm. We had spent such a long time at Ms Jareau's home and even though the conversation could have went further, I still felt we had made some progress, be it very little. Although I'm beginning to think that we aren't going to get much more out of Ms Jareau or JJ. At this rate we'd probably get more out of Angus himself. 

The only thing that kept replaying over and over again in my mind was the dates. Ms Jareau told us they first started chatting in 1985 and then Angus moved in with them in 1987. I don't know if it's just me being paranoid or whatever but I sure as hell wouldn't let some guy I'd met over the internet move in with me and my two young daughters after only a couple of years. Had they even met face to face before 1987? Another date that stuck in my head was 1998. What on earth happened in 1998 that is so significant to the Jareau family? I swear to myself when I get back and see JJ she will tell me, tell us. I know it's not fair to force her to tell us but she's holding back key information that can jeopardise the case. After all, surely she wants to catch Angus just as much as we do.

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Both Emily and Morgan arrived back to the team in a reasonable amount of time that ensured everyone wouldn't be too busy, including JJ, who was trying her best to avoid everyone and any question she may get. 

JJ was sitting in an armchair away from the rest of the team, it was obvious that she didn't want to be a part of the case and wanted to just forget all about it. She had pulled her knees up underneath her chin, it seemed like she was trying to make herself as small as possible. Everyone knew this was a defence mechanism that victims often fell into when they felt pressurised, although just the word victim being linked with JJ was tough enough for anyone. JJ was strong, funny and caring, not a victim. 

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JJ'S POV:

I glanced up when the door suddenly swung open, it was Emily and Morgan. I could feel their eyes on me as soon as they stepped through that door. I was curious to know what my mother had said to them, actually that's a lie, I was dying to know. She can be such a blabbermouth at times and I know how much she resents everything that happened, yet never blames herself. Of course she would never blame herself and realise that she was an awful mother. 

Then again was I much better than her at being a mother? I would never let someone harm my children don't get me wrong, but not being there for them is just as bad. This job has kept me away from so much, it's kept me away from my kids, it's ended my marriage to Will. When I first signed up I didn't exactly think it would work it like this, in my mind I would be helping the innocent and locking away the evil. Although right now I'm not exactly helping the innocent am I? I'm not telling the team all I know because I don't want them to think of me differently and look at me differently. I'm too worried about my own image to save what could be his next victim. 

I zoned back into the conversation that they were having when something that Emily said just about stabbed me like a dagger to the heart. 1998. That's the one thing she couldn't get past. All of their suggestions about what happened in 1998 are wrong and it's almost frustrating. I know that it's going to come out sooner or later and I'd much rather it came from my mouth than anyone else. 

I pushed my legs down from underneath my chin and sat up, I noticed a few glances from Spence and Garcia, who weren't very subtle when it came to making eye contact. They were all still debating the year 1998 and I knew I had to tell them myself because there was no way they were going to find it out themselves. 

Suddenly, or at least it felt sudden to me, I spoke up and began to tell the team about the year 1998 and the horrors within it: 

"The year 1998 then? Well it's a long story but you're going to need to know about it if you want to catch this asshole...."