Violation and Trust

The Final Argument

Riven and I were dating for three years. Our relationship wasn't the best, I admit, but we made it work. Riven could be a bit coarse sometimes, but to be fair, I wasn't an angel either. When I think about it, Riven and I were kind of alike. Hard-headed, inexpressive, not wanting to admit we were wrong and wanting the other to apologize first.

He wasn't always rough. In fact, he was a really nice guy. You just had to find it under all that toughness. He brought me flowers before and other gifts. He never forgot my birthday. She begins smiling as she fondly remembers this. Once, on my birthday, I was really sick and couldn't go anywhere. I think Aisha told him and he ditched school to come and see me. We listened to albums until I fell asleep after a couple of hours. Somehow, he picked out all my favorite ones. That day is probably my favorite memory.

But days like those were few and far in between. Most days, Riven and I fought over the most frivolous of things. I never remembered what started the arguments. Sometimes, we had bigger ones, like when I told him he should stop acting so tough all the time and I'd be more open if he would. He took offense to that and accused me of being an airhead. We didn't even look at each other for a whole week after that.

Then, one day, we had our biggest argument yet. I can't remember everything that was said, but I know it ended with yelling, blaming, hurtful names and me screaming, "I've had it with you!" My friends said we sounded like we were in a war zone.

"Why do you always blame me?" he asked me in probably the angriest tone I'd ever heard. "You're part of this too!"

"You act like a child!" I yelled at him. I was seething and seeing red. My face could've been redder than my friend Bloom's hair.

"You are a child!" he fired back at me. "You whine and can never admit anything, like a stupid little kid!"

"I'm the one who tries to keep this relationship in tact, you arrogant chauvinist!" I retorted. "You just walk with your hands in your pockets like you know it all!"

"I know my girlfriend likes to act like she's my mother," he said. "Why don't you have a child if you want someone to boss around and be your scapegoat? Because that's all you seem to do!"

I was so hurt by that comment. I don't know why. I never thought about having a kid before. I mean, maybe. I did like kids, but the thought of becoming a mother never crossed my mind. I think I may have started crying. And I remember he said, "You always do that."

"Do what?" I asked him.

"We get mad, we fight and you start crying," he told me. At least, he wasn't yelling anymore, but if I was crying, I wanted him to shut up. But he didn't. He kept talking.

"For once, I don't care," he said. "You can cry all you want. I'm sick of always being the bad guy here."

"Then, maybe you should stop acting like one," I told him.

"You should stop treating me like I am," he said back. "You're not innocent either and those tears don't make you innocent."

"You think I'm faking?!" My anger fired up again.

"No, but I think I'm tired of being blamed and treated like a child," he said.

"And I'm tired of being the one who fixes everything and always has to make things work," I told him.

"So what are you saying?"

"I've had it with you and I'm done! That's what I'm saying!"

He stuck his hands in his pockets and made a cool face, like what I'd just said didn't matter. "Fine," he said. His tone suddenly sounded casual, as if we'd been having a normal conversation. But he said nothing more and walked out the door. I was left open-mouthed and speechless. He could've at least said goodbye. Did our relationship mean nothing to him those past three years?

After he left, I just sat on my bed and cried with my hands over my face. In a way, I was glad it was over. I was no longer holding onto a relationship that was going nowhere, no matter how much hope I had for it. But, right then, I felt like someone had yanked my heart out my chest and stomped on it.

Back to the present...

"I'm so sorry," Kelly told Musa, handing Musa a tissue. "But if it was that bad, it's better that it ended."

"I know," Musa agreed with her. She wiped her eyes with the tissue before she got any more tears. "But it still hurt so much."

"You invested three years into it. Of course, it hurt to end it," Kelly said. "But it sounds like that was best."

Mira came back, holding a tray of food for Musa. "Your friends are on their way, sweetie. Are you alright?"

"Yes, I'm feeling alright for now," Musa answered.

Mira handed her the tray and noticed her face appeared wet. "You've been crying. Are you sure you're alright?"

"She was telling me what happened from the very beginning," Kelly explained. "You missed the first part."

"Can I stay to hear the rest?" Mira asked.

"Okay," Musa said. She gave Mira quick summary of what she told Kelly. After Mira agreed that what she did was for the best, she went on with her story.