I'm Sorry (Sequel to "No Feeling")

Chapter 16

Mitch's POV

I hated it. Not being able to see. It was like being in a dark room, and every so often, you could hear a random sound. It could be close or far away, but it was terrifying. They happened out of the blue.

One sound, though, bothered me more than the rest. The sniffling. Mar was upset. She never cried, but you could still tell when she was upset. She'd gone outside to take a call, and had come back like this. I hated that too. When my best friend was upset.

"Hey," I called, raising my head from my pillow. The sniffling stopped and I could hear the shuffling of Mar's sneakers nearing me.

"Hey," she replied. I was again startled by the proximity of her voice, but I reached for her hand.

"What's wrong?" I asked gently. "Are you okay?" She chuckled, sniffling again, before rubbing circles into my hands, the way she does when she's comforting me (but really wants to comfort herself). 

"Yeah, Mitchie. I'm totally fine. How are you?" Deflection. Typical Mar. To ask my how I am to avoid assessing her own feelings. I sighed in frustration, slumping back against my pillow.

"I would be a hell of a lot better if you'd tell the truth!" I spat. I could feel her stiffen at my bluntness. For a few moments, she stopped rubbing my hand. I wanted to regret my outburst, but I didn't. For once in my life, I didn't want to be the one that everyone worried about. For once in my life, I didn't want to be the baby.

"Mitch-" She began apologetically.

"No, Mar." I pulled my hand out of hers and turned away. "When you learn to talk to me, like a real friend, then maybe you should come back. But for now, I think you should go." 

I squeezed my eyes shut as her breathing grew heavier, the way it usually did when she was really distraught, but I didn't need my eyes to know that she still wasn't crying. She never cried. And that was something else I hated. That she felt like she couldn't cry in front of me.

A part of me knew that this wasn't the way to deal with my frustration. A part of me wanted desperately to call her back as I heard her retreat slowly from the bed. But a much larger part of me wanted to release the seething torrent of anger that was suddenly burning inside me.

I let out an earsplitting scream. I was so mad. Where had it come from? I didn't know and I didn't care. This was a new Mitch. An angry one. One that could stand up for himself, that wouldn't let himself get hurt.

I could hear Marleah shout for a nurse. Maybe I should've been worried about the change taking over me. But anger felt good.