cuffed • g.d

21.

I make my way home in doubt and sadness. Everything seemed dull. Why do you ruin everything? The nagging voice in my head kept screaming that same question at me. I tried to be strong but I couldn't hold it back, the tears flew out of me like rain. My throat got sore, and my head started to hurt. I avoided eye contact with any human passing by. When I finally made it home my body was numb. Me head throbbing, my eyes swollen, throat sore, legs exhausted, heart broken. I sucked it all up and went inside to see my dad cooking up some lunch. I could hear the sizzle on the pan and him whistling.

I wiped my eyes and peered around the wall. He was freshened up, clean shave, new clothes, happier attitude. He was... different. I inch my way to a nearby stool. He heard me sit down and immediately turned his head. "Welcome back sweetheart, how was Lani?" He smiles, flipping over the grilled cheese sandwiches. I shrug my shoulders and muttered my words, "..it was okay.." I sniffle. He looks again to see me staring at the floor, he turns down the stove and works his way over to me. "Hey, you know you can tell me what's bothering you. I know I want the greatest dad in the past but I'm better now, I promise." He taps my shoulder and smiles. I look into he newly gentle eyes in confusion.

"Are you feeling okay? You're usually passed out on the couch by this hour and now your making lunch?"
"Ha, Im fine Taya actually I haven't been relaxed in years."
the aroma of smoke overcome us and he had burnt the sandwiches. "Oh darn!" He runs over and puts the sandwiches on a paper towel and turns on every fan that was in the house. I grabbed my sandwich and headed to my room. I throw my burnt sandwich on the dresser and lay face first on my bed. and cry myself to sleep.

When I woke up no sun was beaming through my window, it was dark. I checked my phone as the time read: 7:33 p.m. I shook my head and stretched my arms out as far as they could go. My body was weak. All the happiness I once held was ripped away by my stupidity and I was sore. So I wanted to relax the only way I knew how to, a bath. I drag myself to the bathroom where I come across my old friend. I fill it up with warm water watching it fill by the minutes. I sway my hands in the water watching it follow my movements. Once it's was filled up to my liking, I took my clothes off, revealing my ugly body. I slowly enter as the heat wraps itself around my body. Aaaahhhhh.

I lay there. Staring at the wall, remember all the times I thought it was going to be the last thing I would ever see. I squeeze my eyes to capture the tears from falling. suck it up you fuck. I found myself slowly sliding under, the water hit my lips, then my nose, I held my breath but before I fully go under I hear tapping. I slid up and waited for for sound to come back. And it does. Tap tap tap.
I get out of the tub with the steam running off my body. I quickly dry off and put on the nearest pair of clothes and tiptoe around my room to listen for the sound again and there it was. Tap tap tap. I rush toward my window, new scratches were forming from each tap. I look to see who it was.

It was Grayson.