Listen up. I'm about to teach you all the most valuable lesson you will ever be taught. Please write the musicals that you think qualify in the comments! (Nicely please, being mean is not cool, amigos)
Two words. Attractive people. Yes. I said that. But you have to believe me that there is an insane amount of attractive Broadway actors. It's unnatural. Aside from listening to their gorgeous singing and then crying, I like to watch the movies that they're in (or a version of their performances on YouTube. Yes, that might be illegal,) to see their beautiful faces. Because I respect any gender that you are attracted to, I will name 5 girls and 5 guys.
Numero uno en la categoria de chico: Aaron Tveit. This man is awesome. He played Enjolras in the Les Miserables movie, Gabe in Next to Normal (the creepy ghost son), Frank Jr. in Catch Me if You Can, and DANNY ZUKO in GREASE LIVE! How is that not awesome?
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
2. Jonathan Groff. Groffsauce. AKA King George in Hamilton, Jesse in Glee, and Melchior in Spring Awakening. (Spring Awakening is a sketchy musical but it's good.) And overall he's probably the most adorable person on this planet. Next to Matt Smith.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
3. Jeremy Jordan. AAHHHH MY BABY!!!!! *Sniff sniff* Jack in Newsies, Jamie in The Last Five Years (Oh my goodness that musical was like The Notebook but with singing.) Clyde in Bonnie and Clyde and he was also a guy in Joyful Noise but I don't think that's a musical and I don't know what his name was. He's also in Supergirl as the nerdy coworker who is secretly in love with Supergirl. That doesn't relate to musicals at all but I love how dorky he is in it.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
4. Derek Klena. He's just a gift to this earth and that's pretty much all I can think of to say.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
5. Daveed Diggs. He is amazing. He played Lafayette in Hamilton and that's about it, BUT he rapped super fast and his hair was in a ponytail and he's adorable. Deal with it. Oh, he also got to wear this sweet purple suit in Act 2 when he played Jefferson. (That jerk.)
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Numero uno en la categoria de chica: Idina Menzel. 'Nuff said.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
2. PHILLIPA FREAKING SOO. MY PRECIOUS CINNAMON ROLL. She played Elizabeth Hamilton in... you guessed it. Hamilton. You know, the wife that that jerk cheated on? Yeah, that's the one.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
3. Jasmine Cephas Jones. Woooh. Jasmine plays Mrs. Maria Reynolds and Peggy Schuyler in Hamilton and I'm not saying she was able to seduce Hamilton with her charms and wit...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
4. Karen Olivo. Wepa! Vanessa! In the Heights is where Usnavi fell and we fell along right with him. Yay cheesy lines!
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
5. Christy Altomare. This wonderful lady is like my idol. My idol guys. She's just so awesome. Here's a lovely picture so you can enjoy her beautiful face.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
So that is my not even nearly complete list of beautiful Broadway actors. I'm starting to feel like it's a requirement or something...
INTERVIEWER: So, are you considered attractive?
ME: Umm... I guess not? Like I don't really-
INTERVIEWER: Okay thank you for your time. Send the next one in, Jim!
