Somebody That I Used To Know

➸ 10. That Night

*Above is Julien before he left Jade. Back before the tattoos - still as a 16 year old boy (Stephen James )

Jade

Two days later, and I was still feeling the effects of Julien's sudden reappearance. It felt like my soul was stuck somewhere inside me, not knowing really what to do.

Half of me was happy to have him in my presence at least, to know he was here, close by. The other half was devastated at how he was treating me. I figured he hated me for that night that he walked in on two years ago, but he doesn't even know the story of what happened. He just assumed and then walked out of my life forever. Over something that wasn't even what it seemed.

I know how it looked to him. I know how i looked to him, but he never even gave me the chance to explain. He wouldn't even pick up the damn phone. Two years of never seeing him or talking to him again and now he's just back, out of nowhere. He acts as if I don't exist, then he does the one thing that he knows will hurt me more than anything, associating with Eve. 

Eve knew how close Julien and I had been years ago. She was one of my friends, someone I allowed in my life along with Maya. She never knew how serious it had gotten between Julien and I, that we gave ourselves to each other, but she knew that he meant something to me. She knew that near the end, we had a different kind of friendship, but she wasn't sure what it was and I never told her the extent of it because I saw how much she was changing.

She loved the popular crowd back then. She wanted to be one of them. We thought it was an adorable trait how she swooned over the popular guys when Maya and I first became friends with her, but along the way she changed. I saw how she would bat her eyes up at Julien before he and I ever became more and it pissed me off. I guess that was when I began to hold a grudge but I had my reasons over the years, and even more reasons now.

It wasn't her fault Julien left me though. It was Tyler's and for that, I will never ever forgive him.

I rested my head in my hands as I sat in front of my mirror to get ready for school, remembering the events that took place that night that Julien shunned me for good and never spoke to me again. It was the night that haunted me everyday, and not just because he left, but because of what happened to me.

It was two years ago..

A week after Julien and I slept together, when we gave each other our virginity on my sixteenth birthday, things had been different between us. 

The night we made love was a night I would never forget. I felt something that I had never felt before and yeah, it was weird at first when we kissed but I liked it. We had kissed before, just a peck on the lips, but I never counted those as my first kiss because they were so chaste. This kiss had been my actual first kiss because it was a real one, one filled with passion and love. I came alive with that kiss. Then he said he wanted to ask me something very important.

I felt that I knew what he was going to ask. I don't know how I knew, I could just read him. I couldn't lie - I had thought about it as well.  I wanted my first to be someone I cared about. I hadn't been interested in seexx like all the other girls at school were, but the feelings he gave me whenever we cuddled next to each other in bed and I would feel him hard against me would always give me weird feelings in the pit of my stomach. I would see him naked sometimes and my body would heat up. I started thinking about it often - about losing my V card, but I wanted it to be with someone I loved and that loved me. I didn't want to be someone's 'friday night fling.' 

When he told me he had something important to ask me and that it was big, and that if I didn't want to he would understand, I felt like I knew exactly what it was. Losing your V card is a scary thought when you've never even remotely done anything with a guy, but with Julien, I trusted him. I trusted him so much that it didn't sound scary. In fact, it made me feel giddy inside as he left my room and told me he would be back in a while.