Clouds ☁ Ereri

Chapter 6 ~ Smiles and Sobs

Levi knocked curtly on the wooden doors. Eren, within the last day, had refused to stay in the dungeon so as by Levi's request had actually taken over his old quarters. Despite the restraints Erwin showed to the option, Hanji was persuasive- especially when she had one of Heichou's threats looming over her. Levi would not let Eren had nightmares in the dungeon any longer. Levi had little time left and he was going to make sure he showed Eren all the love he had.

'Eren?' He called out when the door didn't open. He must have been asleep so, after peering in, Levi snuck into his old room and saw Eren snoring away on the bed- although, rather cutely.

'Eren, wake up.' Levi cooed into his ear, shaking him awake as gently as he could. Eren, blinking rapidly, opened his eyes and was met by the sight of Levi, smiling.

'Heichou.' Eren slapped a smile onto his face, preparing himself for the lines that were about to come. 'How was your checkup.' He spoke groggily yet his eyes still shone like the stars, glistening in the afternoon light. It was odd that Eren was asleep at all but the exhaustion of wheeling a man who no longer remembered him around had got to him and he had practically passed out when he hit the bed.

'They didn't find anything unusual.' Levi lied, his eyes betraying it all but Eren didn't look, he didn't want to look- he was too scared to look.

'I see...look! I changed the bed sheets, Heichou!' Eren stated proudly, finally making eye contact, finding the light that had once been diminished. Eren's smile changed to a look of disbelief as Levi's hand rested on his head and ruffled his hair. 'Heichou?' He asked, his voice miniature as his body began to shake once again.

'I'm sorry...for making you worry.' Levi smiled gently, to as much an extent as he could muster in the situation at hand. A tear spilled down Eren's cheek, rolling like a wave to the shore. Before seconds had passed, a river was flowing and Eren was finally letting each and every tear out.

'Why- Why am I crying?' He hiccuped, drawing a few away from his cheek with his finger. Eren, without realising, fell to the floor, his legs no longer being able to stand. He had hidden his true emotions for so long, he just wanted to let it all out. He had cried before, he had trembled before but never had he done this. Never had he broken down.

'I-I'm sorry, I'm crying again.' He mumbled, a sob reaching his throat before he had time to send it back. 'I can't stop.' Eren continued, looking up at Levi, the man barely visible through the tears. 'It won't stop.' He spoke irritably, furiously wiping away the tears but he couldn't. His arms had been locked around another. Levi had brought him to his chest, now on his knees too, cooing soothing words into his ear.

'You don't have to apologise, Eren. I'm sorry for causing you pain.' Levi kept a straight face but he knew he was about to break. The rope was beginning to fray and it was only a matter of seconds until it snapped.

'Eren.' Levi breathed, his eyes meeting Eren's.

'Heichou.' Eren smiled, his lips glistening as the tears, that had finished their path, glistened in the light. Levi looked down longingly at them before returning his eyes back to Eren's. They both leaned in at the same time, their lips scathing each other before they entered a chaste kiss.

'Sorry I keep crying.' Eren spoke as they pulled away, the tears drying up and a gentle smile returning to his face. He had locked those feelings back up only if to keep Levi strong. Showing weakness would only lead Levi to pity him- he didn't want that. Eren wanted to be equals with Levi, not corporal and recruit, no matter how impossible it sounded.

Levi just stared at Eren, sad to see the tears drain away. Because the rope had snapped and Levi was breaking. Tell me what the side effects are, Hanji! The memory hit him like a tsunami, crashing him against a wall until the tears spilled. They did. With Eren still in his sights, the tears began to rain down.

'Eh?! What's wrong, Heichou.' Eren talked panicked, rushedly. He had never seen Levi cry- he was the boy that didn't cry. This was impossible or so he thought.

'I'm scared, Eren. I'm really f*cking scared.' He tried to keep his voice together but it only sounded strained, cracking at the end of his sentence as a sob rose in his throat.

'Huh?'

'I'm going to forget again, aren't I? Hanji...she told me...about my illness. What if? What if this day ends and I wake up tomorrow and I'm not myself again.' Levi began to shake rapidly as Eren watched on with curiosity, distraught that he didn't know how to help. 'I'd be hurting you again, wouldn't I? When I think that...it makes me so f*cking scared, Eren.' Levi began to panic, images of scenarios that could happen flashing before him like a video rolling on repeat.

'Levi.' This was a command, not a request. Levi brought his eyes to Eren, his cheeks being pulled forward by the force of Eren's hands. 'To tell you the truth, I'm scared too. I'm scared of waking up and you not recognising me.' A tear rolled down both of their cheeks, dripping off their chins like water from an icicle. 'But, I'm sure,' he continued, 'that it'll be okay. I mean, you remembered me, right? And right now, you're really looking at me. You're not the same as you were back then. So, don't cry anymore, Heichou.' They found each other's eyes once more and the tears began to fade. Levi smiled weakly but it was a smile nonetheless.

'Eren.' He breathed, taking their joined hands and pressing his lips against the back of Eren's hand. 'I love you.' He murmured and through his slight shock at the admission- Levi wasn't one to say it often- Eren returned it.

Smiling, they lay against the bed and let their eyes flutter shut, not knowing what could happen the next day.

word count: 1035

published: 08.04.17