Begin Again

Chapter 25

(RYAH)

I rested my head on Torin's shoulder as we watched Thea and Lilly chase butterflies in the field. Ben and Ellie were playing with Eric and showing him the chickens. He walked over to a docile one and picked it up. The bird flapped its wings startling the boy and he let it go immediately. Ben's laugh carried over to us as he looked at the surprised expression on his son's face. I spotted Petey sitting on the fence of the corral watching the road looking for Peter. I knew that he wanted him to return. I also knew that as long as I was in Chedix that Peter wouldn't be able to return. 

"What are you thinking about?" Torin asked and I glanced up at him. 

"I was thinking about Peter, actually," I said waiting for his expression to change or his position to shift uncomfortably at the mention of Peter. Torin didn't do anything to suggest that he was jealous that my mind was on another man. Instead he reached up to tuck a stray strand of hair behind my ear.  

"It isn't your fault that he is gone."

"I think that it is."

"He made the choice to leave." 

"I feel like we kicked him out of his home," I said thinking about how he left after I rejected him. 

"We have our own home we could return to, if you're ready."

I sat up away from his shoulder "Are you serious?"

"Are you ready?"

"I do miss my parents." I said and he nudged me with his shoulder.

"Anything else that you miss?" He asked and I knew that he was referring to the little house in the field. It seemed like a lifetime ago. I thought about the house that we had spent so many hours together building. I could imagine the strong walls and curling up in front of the fire. 

"Everything that I could miss is right here with me," I replied and he placed a quick kiss on my lips.  

"We can leave whenever you want to go," He said and I sat back down placing my head on his shoulder. I watched as Thea pounced down on a clump of grass and stayed down with her hands cupped together. Lilly bounced over and crouched down next to her sister. Thea gently cupped the butterfly and opened her hands a crack. Lilly leaned forward to place her eye against the crack and peer down at the trapped butterfly. Ryah heard her gasp as Thea opened her hands and the butterfly fluttered away. Its colors were bright and it flew high. The two little girls stared in awe as it climbed higher and higher. Lilly spun around slowly looking at the ground and then she pointed. Thea followed her finger and the two girls tip toed forward sneaking towards their next unsuspecting victim. 

I turned to look at Petey sitting on the fence with his elbows resting on the fence and his face in his hands. I leaned up again and stood up. Torin gave me an odd expression as I dusted the dirt off of my skirt. 

"I will be back in a moment," I told him and he nodded. I walked over to where Petey was leaning. "Hey," I said and he didn't give any indication that he had heard me. I pulled myself up onto the fence with him to stand next to him.

His shoulders lifted and fell as he let out a loud sigh. 

"You miss Peter, don't you."

He lifted his shoulders and let them fall back down again.

"It's alright to miss him." 

I watched as he lifted his arm to wipe across his cheek. I knew that he had been crying for his old friend.

"I know that he surprised you when he left but I know that he will be back soon."

"How do you know that?" He asked quietly.